COVIDiocy: A Deadlier and More Widespread Contagion Than Flu

Bill reports,

I am writing to let you know that the infection is spreading, and it may be terminal. I am referring, of course, to the stupidity infection sweeping the nation. I returned from a trip to Pisgah National Forest in North Carolina yesterday. I was camping with my family in an area near the small town of Brevard. My family would not wear masks anywhere. Here are my observations:

  1. Going into an Ingles for food resupply, we were among maybe 10 people in the entire store not wearing masks. We received reproving stares from many of the people there, but no comments, which would have allowed me to respond. I closely observed the people wearing masks and I saw this:

– 90% of them were wearing their masks incorrectly, which negates the supposed purpose.

– At least 25% of them were using bandannas, neck gaiters, homemade contraptions, etc, which are useless…unless they were there to rob the place.

– People were touching everything, and many of them were reaching under their masks to touch their face, completely negating the supposed purpose.

– The cashiers would pull their masks down to talk, if someone could not understand them. The customers would pull their masks down to respond.

  1. The rash of lone drivers wearing masks while traveling down the road seems to be increasing.
  2. I went to Sliding Rock, which is a natural rock slide on a mountain stream. There were people wearing masks…while swimming (no kidding). …a woman there … was wearing a mask and a face shield. She had the face shield up and the mask pulled aside, while she smoked.
  3. I went to an ice cream shop, where every employee had the mask down below their nose. However, one of them wanted to remind us to distance ourselves 6 feet apart. I asked where the science was to back up this admonition. He looked stricken, then said he didn’t care, that is what the governor said to do.

Yesterday I packed up, left the campground, and came home. I could no longer enjoy myself there. A man, walking alone, was wearing a mask outside in broad daylight. He moved to the other side of the road when I came along on my bike, and said I needed to maintain better distancing. I stopped, looked at him, and said, “Sir, ultraviolet light dissembles SARS-CoV-2 in less than 5 seconds. The wind is blowing. There is a nearly ZERO chance you will catch something out here. Therefore, unless you are allergic to the outside air, in which case you need to go inside, you are clinically insane.”

I went back to the campsite and told my wife and children we were leaving. We packed up and went home. This was a tragically wasted vacation (or at least a very hard to enjoy one), but a chance to observe Boobus Americanus in his natural environment.

Finishing on a positive note, I went by a used sporting goods store in Brevard. The owner was not wearing a mask, nor was his lone employee. He stated that he has never worn one, and he would not start. He and I talked about my time in DC wasting the taxpayer’s money, and he told me about his sister who works in a hospital. Her take was that this was some sort of evil scam.

Boy, that’s one perspicacious sister!

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12:21 pm on July 12, 2020

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