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Tom Chartier: Archives

Past articles by Tom Chartier on LewRockwell.com

I Was a TSA Porn Star
Not exactly my plan, says Tom Chartier.

Hey, Dude President
Tom Chartier has a towering suggestion for you.

Taliban in Cahoots With Drug Lords!
Um, not quite.

The Solution to Global Warming
Tom Chartier on swine flu.

A Job for the Somali Pirates
Let them hijack the "toxic assets," says Tom Chartier.

My Blackwater T-Shirt
It's worth a bundle, says Tom Chartier.

Dub, Old Buddy
Say it isn't so.

Rejoice in the Depression
It was long past time to cut back, says Tom Chartier.

The Shoes of Freedom
Toss them!

What To Get Lew for Christmas
A gift list from Tom Chartier.

Bad Mojo
For Sarkozy.

Get Out Your Wheelbarrow
Tom Chartier on Weimar USA.

I'm a Baad Libertarian
Tom Chartier is sorry.

Farewell, Charley
Tom Chartier on the retirement of the great columnist.

PNAC Goes AWOL
Tom Chartier on the axette of evil.

Al-Sadr's Hole Card
Tom Chartier on the key guy in Iraq.

Trouble in Israel?
Olmert may be replaced by more of a warmonger.

Change vs. Victory
Tom Chartier on the race to be dictator.

The TSA Peep Show
Tom Chartier on government "security" and your naked body.

A McCain Father's Day
Gifts in honor of the warmonger.

How To Spend Your Summer Vacation
Tom Chartier on what to do if you're a plebe.

Rock 'n Roll Fantasy Camp?
Make that R 'n R reality camp, says Tom Chartier.

Six Blue Iguanas
Their death, and immigration.

A Monument to Stupidity and Worse
Tom Chartier on Mt. Rushmore.

Understanding Islam
And the tragedy of ignorance.

Lending a Helping Claw
Uncle Sam and Iraq vets.

McCain Overdoses
On McCainovision. Article by Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard.

Kiss Your 2nd Amendment Goodbye
Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard on neocon schemes.

All That Warrantless Wiretapping
Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard on pols and hookers.

How To Vote Responsibly
A guide for the confused, by Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard.

Pusillanimous Pols
Or are the Dems getting better on impeachment? Article by Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard.

Hooray for Stalinist America
Where Bush sings, Under My Thumb. Article by Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard.

Disposing of Unwanted Dictators
Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard have some advice for the US.

Confessions of a Middle-Aged Punk
To play rock, you have to know the blues. Article by Tom Chartier and Elizabeth Gyllensvard.

Dear Mitt
We're all disgusted, says Tom Chartier.

Give Them a Stupidity Quotient Test
Tom Chartier on the politicians.

Dear Rudy
What's all this about a "virtual fence"? Tom Chartier wants to know.

Are Your 'Elected Officials' Defective?
Tom Chartier on what to do about it.

Is Your Child's Backpack Heavy Enough?
Tom Chartier on homework.

Federal Disaster Aid
It's always a disaster, says Tom Chartier.

What a Bunch of Idiots
Tom Chartier on our "elected" officials.

Operation Chicken Freedom
Tom Chartier applies to Blackwater.

Whoops! How Did Those Nukes Get There?
Tom Chartier on the best and the brightest.

Hooked on Chaos
Tom Chartier on his son's eight-day week.

Dear Dubya:
Call Ahmadinejad's bluff, says Tom Chartier.

The Hurricane and Me
Tom Chartier on Dean.

All the Poisons
And all the poisoners. Tom Chartier on politics.

Declare War
On Italy, says Tom Chartier.

America Has Two Dictators
Tom Chartier on our unique regime.

Is DC a Lunatic Asylum?
Tom Chartier on The System.

I Was Wrong
Tom Chartier now sees the wisdom of neoconservatism.

In the Age of Bush and Putin
Movies to watch, from Tom Chartier.

I'm Proud of the Decision That Got You Fired
Tom Chartier tells his father for the first time.

Dead-Eye Dick at West Point
What a rowzer!

Business Is Booming
The war business. Article by Tom Chartier.

That'll Learn the Little Twerp
Tom Chartier on equal-opportunity oppression.

Dubya's Medal
Tom Chartier on where he got it.

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors
But not if they are involuntary.

Don't Pressure Your Kids
They get enough.

Dear Dubya
I found you a War Czar, says Tom Chartier.

The Surge Is Working!
For Muqtada al-Sadr.

Feeding Kids into the Grinder
Tom Chartier on a young Marine.

His Hat Is in the Ring
Tom Chartier on ten reasons to vote for him.

Are You Hearing Voices?
Tom Chartier on the talking WC.

Look Out!
It's Robo-Car!

We Ain't No Stinking Mercenaries
Tom Chartier on "private contractors."

Invest Wisely
Buy…copper?

Is Your Child a Math Moron?
Tom Chartier on the government's latest scheme to make sure.

The Project for the New American Disaster
Tom Chartier on the neocon crime plan.

On the Brink
Of WWIII.

Puppet Leader
Tom Chartier on Maliki and the worst job.

The Fratboy-in-Chief
Tom Chartier on Bush.

The Ticking Clock
Tom Chartier on atomic war.

If Dubya Talks and Nobody Listens…
Does he make a sound?

The Whacking of 'Don Hussein'
Powerful criminal families clash.

Dear Dubya
Time for a military makeover, says Tom Chartier.

The Decider Hath Decided
Tom Chartier on the way forward.

Dear Lew:
What I want for Christmas, by Tom Chartier.

Suicide Poker…
Or Arabian roulette?

Are We Comfortable Yet?
Tom Chartier on yet another DC whitewash.

I Died For Freedom, This I Know
For those who bade me fight, told me so.

How To Dispose of Unwanted Gifts
Important seasonal advice from Tom Chartier.

Paying for Their Own Liberation
Democracy doesn't come cheap, y'know.

National Sorry Day?
How do we atone, asks Tom Chartier.

Wanted: Asylum
Our Beloved Leader asks Tom Chartier to draft a letter to fellow world figures.

We the People
An open letter to congress from Tom Chartier.

The Day the Bomb Blew
Tom Chartier tells all.

Who Let the COW into the Classroom?
Tom Chartier on teaching in the iStupid age.

Throw the Bums Out
After all, they're no angels, says Tom Chartier.

If You Must Vote
Get an absentee ballot, says Tom Chartier.

How To Spot a Dictator
Tom Chartier on the tell-tale signs.

We Encounter the Yuppies
Tom Chartier on an American Odyssey.

Nukalert
Tom Chartier is nostalgic for the Cold War.

This Is the Way of Dictatorship
Tom Chartier on neo-America.

Sealing Off the Perimeter
Tom Chartier on keeping the undesirables off his island.

The Shiny New Baghdad Police College
A microcosm of the whole US disaster in Iraq.

A Radical Plan for Iraq
Dear Dubya, by Tom Chartier.

Hey, Bush
Just how stupid do you think we are?

The Land Without Hope
Tom Chartier actually agrees with President Bush.

America…
I apologize, says Tom Chartier.

The Ditch
Tom Chartier on the awful-hilarious latest from the "war on terrorism."

A Nightmare for the USA
Tom Chartier on WWIII.

Standin' at the Crossroads
Tom Chartier on the US blues.

When Will Americans Take America Back?
And other questions, from Tom Chartier.

Dear Dubya
Help is on the way, says Tom Chartier.

The Paranoia Gap Must Be Closed
Tom Chartier on the garbage police.

How Paranoid Can We Get?
Tom Chartier on the federal crazy-state.

The Land of the Bush, and the Home of the Afraid
Tom Chartier on the state of air travel.

I've Seen the Future
And you're not going to like it, says Tom Chartier.

Happy Birthday, Dubya
Tom Chartier on what to get the Decider who has everything.

How Many My Lai's?
Tom Chartier on war atrocities.

All Hail Our Master's Voice
Got your tv set tuned to FOX?

And the Winner Is...
Tom Chartier on the garrison state.

They're All a Bunch of Loonies
Tom Chartier on our rulers.

Scooter, You Are Cordially Invited
To go Hunting.

Listen Up, Tenderfeet
All you sodbusters gather 'round, says Tom Chartier.

A Trip to Cemetery Beach
Tom Chartier on gratitude.

Dear Dubya, You Need My Help
On the guitar.

A Weekend To Ponder
Clearly, Bush couldn't care less about Americans or the world.

A Man Must Tinker
Ladies, stupid will do as stupid does, says Tom Chartier.

The Dog Food Scandal
No more will the wool be pulled over Tom Chartier's eyes.

Put the Blinders on Before It's Too Late
Erase all subversive thoughts.

How To Be a Bum
For all of you who asked.

How Many My Lai's?
Tom Chartier on a true story of Vietnam.

Operation Chicken Freedom
Tom Chartier on putting down the fowl insurgency.

Dear Dubya
Tom Chartier on how to become Man of the Century.

Respect Mon
Tom Chartier on understanding another people.

I Am a Bum
Tom Chartier on the glory of it all.

 
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