Tom Kowitz formerly hosted the hilarious “Baldie & The Blonde Radio Show” with Michele Gaudin (in a loss for both comedy and freedom, Tom and Michele have moved on to other pursuits). When I caught up with Tom the other day, he related this anecdote about a recent flight and his “random” selection for gate-rape. Tom was departing
…out of Midway International Airport in Chicago. … The agent, a female, called for a male assist, but there were no male agents around.
Makes sense, there being no men anywhere at the TSA. But I digress.
After waiting way too long, I approached the agent and told her I know that TSA’s policy is that pat-downs are to be conducted by someone of the same sex as the passenger presents himself or herself, and that I was presenting myself as a woman. (Here’s how TSA explains it on its web site: “If a pat-down is performed, it will be conducted by an officer of the same gender as you present yourself.”)
The rest of the conversation went something like this:
“You’re a man.”
Well, I was offended, and I told her so. “How dare you! I am a woman, and I demand to be patted down by a woman!”
“You look like a man to me.”
Tom “was dressed in jeans, sweatshirt, and sneakers, as were probably 99 percent of those who attended the recent women’s marches.” And so he scolded the TSA’s thuggette:
“That’s a terrible thing to say in this day and age. I’m presenting right now as a woman.”
“You’re dressed like a man.”
“That doesn’t mean anything! I’m telling you, I am presenting as a woman!” I was loud and indignant. “Get a female agent to pat me down!”
After a few more exchanges like this, a male agent came rushing up from behind me while shushing the agent I had been arguing with. “Okay, okay, okay. I got this, I got this.”
“That took way too long,” I said. I was prepared to state that I was gender-fluid and was now presenting as a male, but it never came to that. The male agent proceeded to give me the fastest, most cursory pat-down I’ve ever had, and I’ve had many dozen.
With the Trumpster’s electoral victory, such opportunities to turn the Progressive State’s insanity against it may diminish, praise God. But in the meantime, if the TSA’s deviants come for you as they did Tom, and you want a “cursory” manhandling rather than the full monty, you now know how to “present” yourself.
11:04 am on January 25, 2017
