It’s Time To Pull the Plug on the UN

Every wonder what can possibly happen on a foreign aid humanitarian mission? Well, have a look. Now, I don’t want to make fun of this because this is a horrifying thing and the survivors will be in a living hell. But I will say this: I humbly suggest that every American demand our money back from the United Nations. How long have we been carrying water for this pathetic joke of a “peacekeeping force” that can’t seem to keep any peace, defend anybody, or stop “Never Again” from never again and again and again all over the place?

It seems that even the United States government itself peed down their pants leg about trying to stop the actions of what amounts to a terrorist group. They threw these people under the bus. Or, under the white-painted UN armored personnel carrier, such as the case may be. I would imagine the UN peacekeepers were too scared and too busy doing bong hits in those APCs to bother responding and doing their frickin’ jobs. Who was in charge of changing their diapers that day, anyway?Excuse me, but we can understand the UN wetting their pants at the thought of firing their own weapons. But what happened to the tough guys in the U.S. government that talk so tough you’d think they bite the heads off of animal crackers day and night?

Now, I would say that people really better think twice about serving in certain places overseas. Especially places where the kids probably get an AK-47 and a party-pack of grenades for their coming out party. Yes, it’s sad. Yes, it’s tragic. But in many cases, I’m sorry, but there’s not much you can do on the ground. And how about the fact that the United Nations is just a paper tiger? Think you can count on those blue-helmeted clowns to rescue anyone? Sometimes, those UN peacekeepers are the ones forming up rape gangs themselves. See, unarmed women are about all that a UN peacekeeping force can engage and survive without surrendering.

Why are we even in the United Nations? Hasn’t the time come to pull the plug on this Frankenstein of foreign policy? This experiment has failed. It’s time to scrape the smelly slime off the petri dish into the trash and chalk it up to big idea, small results. Wasn’t the original idea of this sham force of tin soldiers to park them between two combatants in a war to create a buffer zone? How’d that work? I think this didn’t work out so well in the Suez Crisis. Not until Soviet head honcho Nikita Khrushchev threatened to nuke London and Paris did this crisis end. Not because of the UN. It was because President Eisenhower was crapping bricks about this crisis blowing up into a nuclear war (pardon the pun.) So he ordered the British, French, and Israeli troops out of the pool and the Soviets and Egyptians had a good laugh at snookering the West and causing a NATO family feud. Right, but the UN sent in a peacekeeping force afterwards to go over there and look like they had actually done something. Besides peeing their pants, that is.

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Excuse me, but since when has the UN been effective at anything other than wasting vast sums of cash on senseless projects and missions that accomplish little but employ legions of smug dorks with liberal arts and humanities degrees? I suppose if we wish to know the cultural legacy of some little known tribe in the Amazon (who actually wished to be left alone and not harassed by UN anthropologists), then the UN might have merit upon which to boast. But when you were not able to stop several genocides with UN troops just a hop, skip, and a road march away, you have nothing whatsoever of which you may glorify yourself. And what wars have you managed to stop? None. You have brokered cease-fires, which were periods where the combatants were able to rebuild their forces and repair their armored vehicles to then re-enter hostilities as UN peacekeepers squatted in bunkers and filled their collective pants.

To this worldwide welfare organization we should continue paying?! Our tax money should continue funding this obscene joke of a “League of Nations”? I haven’t forgotten that the League of Nations, which is the grand-daddy of the United Nations, failed to stop World War Two. What, the weapons inspectors just happened to miss all those panzer divisions and squadrons of Stukas just sitting there? And the world had to resurrect this world government cadaver and pawn off this farce as the United Nations? Beg pardon, but this is the sequel to the League of Nations.

“But the UN has weapons inspectors to make sure other countries don’t build nuclear weapons!” Oh, you mean like India and Pakistan did? And Israel has and does, but refuses to admit? And does not allow UN weapons inspectors in to places they say no? The UN doesn’t even realize that it isn’t just the United States as a nation that has the ability to build nuclear weapons. There are about a dozen states in the United States that possess fissile material, technicians, and the facilities to manufacture nuclear weapons and could have about six apiece within a year if they decided to do so. The UN would crap their pants to have to send weapons inspectors in here after the collapse of the United States. They’d be looking for who made off with the 2,600 known nuclear weapons and about four states would be well on their way to making their own. Plus delivery vehicles.

The government of a nation is bad enough. But a world government? Come on, man, the United Nations couldn’t agree on what to order out for lunch. In the end, they’d all starve to death before coming to an agreement on the cuisine. And getting back to these peacekeepers, they’d be better off just hiring some good cowboys here in Arizona to go over there and defend these humanitarian aid missions. Those guys wouldn’t be afraid to shoot a ragtag gaggle of armed goons battering down the door. They wouldn’t need any stinking UN badges, either.

Time and again, the UN is revealed unto us as UN-necessary, UN-able, and UN-skilled. There are three entities by which the American people are being robbed via federal taxes: The United States government, NATO, and the UN. These three organizations are the most pathetic examples of military and leadership bungling, incompetence, and foolishness in the history of mankind. In the past, kingdoms demonstrated the foolishness of central government, but at least it was confined to their realms or neighboring kingdoms. With the United States government, NATO, and the UN, foolishness is exported across the globe. These dung-burglars and purveyors of swindles have no genuine value commensurate with the vast resources wasted on these Franken-states. To wit, I’d like my money back.

If we needed yet another example of how the United States government wastes our money, it is revealed that UN peacekeepers are unable to defend defenseless, unarmed people. Uh, wasn’t that one mission of the UN? Since they have failed time and time again at this relatively simple task, I think we see here a defective product. Therefore, we need to take this back for a full refund. “Would you like to exchange it for a different one, sir?” No! That’s what you said when we took back the League of Nations for a refund because it failed and then there was another world war which you said the warranty didn’t cover. But you said you could exchange it for the United Nations. But now this thing has been in the shop more than it has actually worked! No, I just want my money back.

I understand that the United States pays most of the UN operating budget. And that’s why our taxes are plain wrong. The government has no right whatsoever to take a single penny from the American people and hand it over to a foreign government or some group of dweebs supposing themselves a world government body. Especially when the so-called “peacekeepers” cannot defend women from being gang-raped when those peacekeepers are not raping women themselves. That’s what UN “peacekeepers” were doing in Africa, you know. And elsewhere. One supposes that the UN peacekeepers are where world militaries stash their problem soldiers now that there aren’t weather bases in the Arctic Circle to stash them ever since the advent of weather satellites. And we pay for it.

“Jack, you’re such an isolationist!” Yes, I am, when I see the American people getting robbed to pay for this useless cabal of smarmy charlatans and professional liars. I think it’s high time to keep our own money. Not as in keep it in the United States. I mean in our own pockets. As in, the government needs to make do with less. Right, the UN budget is maintained and the American people are the ones whose household budgets are not. Because we’ve got to pay for this crap. Yes, I’m an isolationist. The world needs to suck it up and solve their own problems. We’re not their cop, teacher, doctor, social worker, or bodyguard. And the United States government has no right to have us being those things and robbing us to pay for it. It is well past time to pull the plug on the UN.