I've Got a Feeling

“I’ve got a feeling, a feeling deep inside, Oh yeah, oh yeah, I’ve got a feeling, a feeling I can’t hide… Ev’rybody pulled their socks up, Ev’rybody put their foot down, Oh yeah. I’ve got a feeling!”

~ Lennon & McCartney

If you consider what I have written here, and how it pertains to you and your life, you will see that this is a very positive message for you. It is a positive message for me that I must share; it is a positive message for everyone.

At the risk of sounding even stranger to some of you than I usually do, I want to tell you about a talent that I have. I call it a “talent,” but I suppose that is not exactly the correct term for it; I reckon it should be called “an ability to be aware.” This ability has allowed me to take in “signs” that happen around me and to know certain things. Actually, I think everyone has this ability, but most people are just not open to the notion or aware of it.

Why many people are not open to this idea is not strange to me: I know that to be open to this awareness requires a belief in “grace.”

Since I was a young man, I always believed that I had the uncanny ability to “know in my stomach” what was going to happen about certain things. Now, these were only things that were truly important, which I would have to seriously consider. They were not frivolous things such as who would win the World Series, or what roulette number to bet on at Las Vegas. No. These were things that would affect me for the rest of my life.

For example: When I was young and my girlfriend told me that she might be pregnant, I got “butterflies” in my stomach. But, after a night or two of serious contemplation, I always knew that it was going to be all right. And it always was. Was I “lucky”? Or have I been fortunate enough to be “aware”? Or is there somebody up there who loves me?

If you are aware of things that happen around you and pay attention, I believe that you can “be in touch” with your inner self and “know” certain things.

(I do not wish to depreciate the subject at hand by adding right here that, after the events of these last 3 days, I will once again state that George W. Bush will be resoundingly defeated on November 2nd by a huge landslide. And I’m serious here. And I think that, if you are aware of this “grace” or “awareness” that I have written about, and if you take in all you have seen around you over these last few days, you’d know that this is what is going to happen. No amount of cheating could possibly make a Bush victory.)

Last Friday I got the chance to meet and talk with Yoko Ono, the widow of former Beatle John Lennon. She is treated like a goddess in this country. Many Japanese worship Yoko Ono; many despise her. When I met her, I realized what charm and grace she possessed and how anyone could be enthralled talking with her, if even for a few moments.

Yoko Ono and John Lennon had a son together named Sean. When I met her I told her that I was half-Japanese and the other two guys that were with me were half-Japanese too; immediately, I could feel an “awareness” in my heart and it told me that I could “identify” with Yoko Ono and she could “identify” with me.

It was a “mother and child” feeling of mutual understanding; we had a moment of “mutual awareness.” I understood some of the challenges she has had to go through; she understood some of the challenges I went through.

The record company people told us that we were not to discuss “war,” but the conversation soon turned to that subject. I left our meeting with the feeling that Yoko Ono, still to this day, has the heart of a young woman, full of dreams.

Oh, how I envied her. I thought about what we had talked about and decided to keep it in mind and to try to be observant over the next few days just to see if I couldn’t find another message in her words.

Then, I saw the article written by Charlie Reese on LRC predicting a Kerry victory. Actually, I’ve come to the conclusion that, between Bush and Kerry, a Kerry victory is preferable. Incredibly, it seems like Kerry will be the fiscal conservative compared to Bush and I think we can avoid a war with Iran under a Kerry Presidency.

I finished Charlie’s article and had a feeling of satisfaction. After that I flicked on the TV and by chance there was George Foreman talking about death — George Foreman, the former Heavyweight Boxing Champion and one of the most feared fighters ever to step into a boxing ring, talking about death and about his career and his plans for another comeback at the age of 55.

“I asked my children, ‘Which are you most afraid of, traveling to Mars and being lost in space or becoming 50 or 60?”‘ Foreman said. “Their answer is always the same: age. I want to show these kids it’s an easy entry to be 50 or 60. You can still dream. I want to show everybody, all the people, that becoming 55 or 60 is not the end of life; it’s the beginning!”

I heard George Foreman’s words and I was immediately inspired. In fact, I felt like he was talking directly to me.

Then George Foreman went on to explain how he died once. I can’t recall his exact words but it went something like this:

“After fighting Jimmy Young I came back to my dressing room and a voice in my head said, ‘You have everything you wanted in this life, Rolls Royce, condominiums; you’re rich, you have nothing left to prove, you can die right now…’ I heard that voice and I thought, ‘Who is saying that? I’m not going to die. I have everything in this life I want, Rolls Royce, condominiums; I’m rich, I have nothing left to prove, I could die right now.’ And then I was shocked, because there — they said it again: ‘I could die right now.’ Then I felt my legs go away. And I was falling into a dark, dark tunnel — a dark hole. And there was darkness and the awful smell of death. And I looked around and I thought, ‘Oh, so this is what death is like… Oh well, I don’t care…. It was nothing but darkness. I said, ‘I don’t believe in religion; but I believe in God.’ And right then, a giant hand reached down and picked me up and pulled me out of the dark hole and I awoke on the table. Here I was, a rich man, I had everything in the world, and I was dead in a dirty, un-air-conditioned dressing room. And my trainers and doctors were there and they had their hands on my head and body and I told them, ‘Don’t touch me,’ because I could see blood on their hands. I realized that Jesus had come into my body and now I wanted to live. Not just exist, but live.”

For the first time in a long time, I witnessed something on TV that held me spellbound. Foreman continued:

“Do you know what the most frightening thing in the world to me is? It’s to ride around in a Rolls Royce, buy a condo, look at your watch and look at the Dow Jones and the Nasdaq; I’m even reading the Wall Street Journal. Things are going wrong here. I don’t want to spend my life like that. I need an adventure. I want to live. That’s not living. That’s existing.”

I listened as George Foreman told his story and I knew he was not exaggerating or making this story up, because I have had a similar experience:

I “died” once. Let me tell you about it: I was floating in the air, my back on the ceiling of my office. I could see a young man lying on the ground and there were three very old men, dressed in white, kneeling around the young man on the floor. I knew the old men were angels, but they didn’t look beautiful like the angels you would see in a Michelangelo painting; these were craggy old men. I looked down at the young man lying on the floor and said, “That guy doesn’t look right!” As I said that, one of the old men looked up at me with a disgusted look in his eyes. And I knew right then and there what the old man was thinking:

“You could have been someone. But you threw it all away.”

And I realized that the dead young man was me. I knew that I had many things left to accomplish in my life. And I said, “No! I can’t die, I have many things to do, I have small children; I still have a mission.” And with that I awoke. I was lying on the floor of my office. It was the middle of the night. And I don’t know how many hours passed, but I awoke.

Now I had, once again, a moment of “inspiration.” Things added up for me right then and there. Here is a list of things that I had been contemplating over these last few days:

  • Interviewing Yoko Ono. Even though the record company people said, “Absolutely no photos,” I was determined to get one with her. In fact, somewhere in my heart, I knew that — even more than 15 years ago — someday I would take a photo with her.
  • Lew Rockwell’s 60th birthday. What does this have to do with anything? A lot. Yoko Ono is over 70 and when I spoke to her I told her, “You, my dear lady, have the youngest heart of anyone in this entire room.” George Foreman was talking about age and dying and how he wants to “live." And he spoke of “grace” and God. This made perfect sense to me.
  • And, finally, the U.S. presidential election.

Now, I’m sitting here, writing this article on a beautiful and sunny Sunday morning. It’s the first sunny day in more than two weeks. I can see Mount Fuji from my window. I have been inspired to write this simple article. Some people will take this as nonsense. But I know people like George Foreman would read this article and understand; he would just “know.”

And if you are “aware,” if you “pay attention,” you will know as I have stated twice now, in November, Bush will lose. Now, the “signs” are coming so fast and furious that only a truly “unaware” person could miss them. Charlie Reese wrote in his article, “It’s one of those either I-told-you-so or my-turn-to-eat-crow kinds of predictions.” But I know this is not true. I know Bush will lose, and lose badly. You know why?

I’ve got a feeling, a feeling deep inside.

This article edited by my friend, Anthony Gregory, who, perhaps not so amazingly, is a huge Beatles fan.