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Albert Gore Is My Name

Wednesday night in his concession speech, Al Gore said that he was going Back to Tennessee to "mend fences, both figuratively and literally." When we heard those words, an image began to form in our minds, a tune to flutter at the fringes of our memories… What was it, that melody we remembered oh so well? Ah, The Band! – "The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down." Suddenly, we saw Gore transformed to a mythic figure, a Virgil Caine for the modern age:

Albert Gore is my name I worked out a great campaign Till Dubya’s lawyers came And threw out my votes again I was the winner I am quite certain I know the true intent of those behind the curtain December 12, the Supreme Court fell That’s a night I remember oh so well

The night they drove old Al Gore down All the pundits were grieving The night they drove old Al Gore down Jesse Jackson’s still believing They went, "Waah, waah-waah, waah-waah-waah Waah-waah waah-waah, waah-waah waah-waah-waah"

Back with Tipper in Tennessee When one day she calls to me Albert, quick come see There goes another Bushie Now I don’t mind mendin’ fences I’m not quite in my right senses You can take the Midwest, even take Kentucky But they never should have taken my state from me!

The night they drove old Al Gore down The Democrats were shouting The night they drove old Al Gore down Paul Begala couldn’t stop pouting They went, "Waah, waah-waah, waah-waah-waah Waah-waah waah-waah, waah-waah waah-waah-waah"

Like my father before me, I am a DC man, Like my father above me, who took a rebel stand. He was just 62, proud and brave, When a GOP dog dug his political grave, I swear by the chads down below my feet, You can’t keep a Gore down even in defeat.

The night they drove old Al Gore down Despite David Boies’ fees The night they drove old Al Gore down Despite Paul Krugman’s pleas They went, "Waah, waah-waah, waah-waah-waah Waah-waah waah-waah, waah-waah waah-waah-waah"

December 16, 2000

Gene Callahan is a regular contributor to mises.org, and Stu Morgenstern is contributing editor at The Frumious Bandersnatch.

2000, Gene Callahan and Stu Morgenstern