The
Good War
by
Bill Bonner
by
Bill Bonner
The Washington
Post reports that the War on Terror is over. No armistice has
been announced. No treaty has been signed. The whole thing is just
being dropped quietly, like a burnt-out cigarette. Too bad. It was
our favorite war.
In the few
words that follow, we explain why. First, the background:
"The history
of the world is but the biography of great men," was Thomas
Carlyle's contribution to the genre. But here we are more of the
'cometh the hour, cometh the man' school of history. When something
needs doing...there is always some clown dim enough to do it. Osama
bin Laden was that man.
"Bleeding
America to the point of bankruptcy," was what he was up to,
he said in a videotape. He even did the math. "Every dollar
spent by al-Qaida in attacking the US has cost Washington $1m (£545,000)
in economic fallout and military spending," said the report.
"We, alongside
the mujahideen, bled Russia for 10 years, [in Afghanistan] until
it went bankrupt... So we are continuing this policy in bleeding
America to the point of bankruptcy."
How many generations
will still tell of bin Laden's triumph? He brought down not just
one empire, but two. His band of terrorists leeched the Soviets
so thoroughly, they fainted. It was no coincidence that the Soviets
lost Afghanistan in the same year their empire disintegrated. Then,
he delivered a challenge to the America's amour propre.
The attack
on the World Trade Center incited a death wish. The feds flashed
a Red Alert; Americans cowered in their houses and sealed their
windows and doors against biological attack. The 9/11 attackers
could have been pursued by the usual gendarmes at negligible cost.
Instead, in the general panic, the Bush administration decided to
go all out. Thus it was that the greatest stimulus package since
WWII began in haste and in delusion.
The federal
budget went from its biggest surpluses to its biggest deficits.
Interest rates were cut too to an emergency rate of 1%. Within
24 months, the bubble in the Nasdaq was replaced by much bigger
bubbles in housing, finance, derivative debt, art, private equity,
executive compensation, student loans and other forms of private
debt. In effect, bin Laden suckered the fattest man on earth into
having another éclair. The thunder coming from the financial
markets for the past 18 months is the noise of his midriff exploding.
But we are
not writing to complain about Osama bin Laden or the Bush Administration's
reaction. When it comes to war and adultery, make-believe may be
better than the real thing. Certainly, it is safer. In the War on
Terror, the enemy had no tanks...no aircraft... no ships...no armies...no
celebrated strategists...no famous generals...no sophisticated weapons...no
military culture...no leather trench coats...no burnished helmets...no
battle cries.... The problem was, it was hard to find the enemy
at all. The Department of Homeland Security conducted 3 billion
airport inspections looking for them. We remember getting patted
down so thoroughly we felt we should leave a tip. But how many enemy
combatants do you think they nabbed? Not a one.
There are two
possibilities. The first is that the security procedures were so
fearsome that terrorists dared not try anything funny. The second
is that there weren't really many terrorists at large at least,
not in the United States of America.
But compare
it to WWI or WWII...or even a penny ante affair like the Spanish
American war. The War on Terror mobilized the whole nation in a
Great National Cause...at much expense, much damage to the Constitution,
and much inconvenience, but without actually causing much real suffering.
Sure, a few hapless Muslims, caught in the wrong place at the wrong
time, were put on the rack. And yes, the cops in London gunned down
a Brazilian electrician. Back in the United States, young couples
did not embrace as they had in WWII that is, as if there
would be no tomorrow. Instead, they spent money as if there would
be no tomorrow! No doubt, the desperate spending contributed to
the bankruptcy of the whole system of bubble finance. But compared
to the pain of a shooting war; the War on Terror was a delight.
As far as we know, the Department of Homeland Security suffered
not a single casualty. Not even any self-inflicted wounds. No executions
for treason. And hardly any reported cases, neither of fleeing in
the face of the enemy...nor collaborating...nor sabotage.
What a shame
to let such a marvelous war to end without even a victory parade.
Some of the agents should at least get medals for courage under
fire...or exceptional valor.
Perhaps some
special award. Such as the special agents who arrested Tamera Jo
Freeman. A "Black Heart" medal might be appropriate. The
woman was on a flight to Denver when her children got into a squabble.
She spanked them both...and then Homeland Security agents put the
cuffs on her. Charged with committing an "act of terrorism"
she spent three months in jail and lost custody of her children.
And
there ought to be some medal for the Pentagon flatfoot who put the
long arm of American law all the way across the Atlantic and onto
the shoulder of Gary McKinnon. Mr. McKinnon, as the mayor of London
informed us on Tuesday, believes in UFOs. And to prove that the
U.S. army is hiding information on extraterrestrials, he hacked
into the Pentagon's computer...leaving his email address and a message:
"Your security is crap."
Rather than
thank him for this useful observation, the Defense Department no
doubt put out a billion dollar consulting contract for someone to
tell them their security is crap...and put out a warrant for Mr.
McKinnon's arrest on a terrorism charge. That kind of service above
and beyond the call of duty should be recognized.
So form up
the battalions of veterans! Assemble the legions of luggage inspectors
and metal detector operators...and all the thousands of investigators,
worn down by five years of following leads to nowhere! Dress them
up in bright, clean uniforms...and give them their moment of glory.
Pin medals on their chests. Then have a jolly march down Fifth Avenue.
Line the streets. Give them a hearty hoorah as they march by. Throw
out the ticker tape. Young girls...fling yourselves at them...and
get a kiss! And then, send them home.
February
5, 2009
Bill
Bonner [send
him mail] is the author, with Addison Wiggin, of Financial
Reckoning Day: Surviving the Soft Depression of The 21st
Century and
Empire of Debt: The Rise Of An Epic Financial Crisis and
the co-author with Lila Rajiva of Mobs,
Messiahs and Markets (Wiley, 2007).
Copyright
© 2009 Bill Bonner
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