The Cryonic Founding Fathers
by
Bill Walker
by Bill Walker
"I wish
it were possible, from this instance, to invent a method of embalming
drowned persons, in such a manner that they might be recalled
to life at any period, however distant; for having very ardent
desire to see and observe the state of America a hundred years
hence, I should prefer to an ordinary death, being immersed with
a few friends in a cask of Madeira, until that time, then to be
recalled to life by the solar warmth of my dear country."
~
a letter that the all-too modern Benjamin Franklin might have written
If
the Founding Fathers could be revived from cryonic suspension in
2005, what would they think of America? What would they think of
their descendants? How long would they stay out of jail?
Some
things would seem familiar, yet improved. A modern bookstore would
be a cornucopia to a man from 1790; even a moderate-sized Barnes
and Noble would more than equal any library they had ever seen.
Amazon.com would truly be a wonder. Whole new fields of knowledge
have come into being, and even events in their own times would be
more clear with our present-day hindsight. The rest of the Fathers
would no doubt be very interested to read about Ben
Franklin’s moonlighting job.
After
they got done pummeling Franklin, the group might catch up on their
political reading. They would find a lot that was familiar. It would
not surprise them to read about corruption or special-interest lobbying.
It would not surprise them to find that the U.S. President had somehow
acquired the power to declare war, print money, or to arbitrarily
jail "evildoers" in Cuba. They had always been concerned
about the tendency of rulers to accumulate power.
Most
or all of them would be glad to see that chattel slavery had been
abolished, though not so glad to hear that uniquely in this country
it was done with mass bloodshed.
Scientific
advances would be very encouraging to them. In their time, there
was no certainty that man would ever have engine-powered ships,
let alone be able to fly. The proliferation of antibiotics and vaccines
would impress them, as would the fact that microscopes allow us
to actually see our microbial enemies. But there would be a sense
of foreboding when they heard that men had once walked on the Moon,
but could no longer do so… and that private citizens are not allowed
to own the nuclear rocket engines developed
40 years earlier. Some of them would see the parallel with the
abject subjects of the Chinese Emperor of their time.
The change that would separate them irrevocably from we moderns
would be our thorough domestication. When told that Americans had
been banned from owning handguns in the nation’s capital and elsewhere;
that people are given long prison sentences for selling opium, hemp,
or cocaine;
that the government not only taxed at will but confiscated property
at will; they would ask: "Where are the Committees of Correspondence?
Where are the rebellious state governments, the rebellious cities,
the rebellious people? Where are the Americans?"
Of
course we would have to shamefacedly reply that there are no rebels;
there are no "Americans." All of us simply allowed the
freedoms they laid out in the Constitution to be peeled away one
layer at time. Today we all simply accept that the government can
print any amount of money it wants and give it to whatever dictatorship
it wants; we can’t even know how much of our labor they give away.
We accept that incumbent Congressmen are always re-elected. We accept
that the Federal government not only maintains a standing army,
but maintains it in nearly every country of the world. Washington
and Hamilton might even stop kicking Franklin long enough to admit
that he was right about one thing: making the Imperial Eagle our
symbol was a bad idea.
So,
once the Founders were here in our time, what would they do? They
were, after all, talented and intelligent, many of them home-schooled;
they would have no trouble learning modern skills. Would they get
jobs with Halliburton and Archer-Daniels-Midland, and live at taxpayer
expense? Or would they go back into politics, and try to promise
more free medical care, education, child care, etc. than the next
politician?
Somehow
I doubt it. I think if Thomas Paine were here to write recruiting
webzine articles, and Jefferson, Adams, Ethan Allan, etc. were here
to lead, that the Americans of 1790 would prevail over the Homelandians
of today. I think the strength and clarity of their thought would
rapidly overcome all the technical advantages of the modern Imperium.
Unfortunately,
Alcor wasn’t around in the early
1800s when most of the Founders died, so we’ll never know. We’ll
have to do the job ourselves.
May
24, 2005
Bill
Walker [send him mail]
works as a Research Associate in telomere biology at an undisclosed
(thanks to legal threats from his tax-financed employer) location.
Copyright
© 2005 LewRockwell.com
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