French Lessons
by
Ira Katz
by Ira Katz
I have been
living in Paris since January. A French company was interested in
my research work and lured me here to work for them; thus I am on
leave from my college for the year. Herein I share with LRC readers
some of the things I have learned and observations.
My arrival
was without incident and now I am quite settled. Much of the credit
goes to Cosmopolitan
Services Unlimited (CSU). CSU primarily consists of a group
of attractive young women that work to ease the transition to life
in Paris. . . . Wait a minute, what are you thinking? These girls
are totally professional. . . Duh! No, not that kind of professional!
The company hired them to obtain my work permit and to help me find
an apartment.
The apartment
market in Paris is fierce. One must have a list of 10 places on
the search day, and rank the choices as they go so fast. But I liked
the very first one and was ready to take it right there. It is even
the best value. But prudence reined and I viewed several more, which
was an interesting way to see Paris. The best feature of the apartment
is its location on rue Daguerre, in the 14th. (Paris
is broken into 20 districts called arrondissements. Locals usually
simply use the number of the arrondissement to describe a location.)
My street has lots of everything and is very lively. In a word,
it is very Parisian.
I am working
at a research center outside of Versailles. I walk to the train
station (Gare Montparnasse), take the 7:20 express (less than 15
minutes) to Versailles Chantier, and there catch a bus to the center.
From door to door it is about 60 minutes. The commute has been my
biggest (but minor) problem in France. I am used to a small town
in the US where I walk to work, or I could drive and get there in
5 minutes.
Also the commute
has been made more difficult by the weather. I expected it to be
warmer and wetter than Easton, PA where I live in the US. But it
has been cold, gray and dark. After waiting for the bus and standing
around French train stations I was chilled all day. I added an extra
layer of clothing that made a big difference. I am exaggerating,
but it seemed like there was not a single nice day. But now it is
spring and things are different, as I will explain below.
As was recently
written about Germans, the French have also been soaking in a socialist
brine for a long time. Thus the company seems very nurturing
and yet somehow profitable. I try not to ask for anything but they
are always giving me something. The company is paying for French
lessons and giving me time during the day to go to class.
In France,
for starting employees the usual number of vacation days is 25.
There are 12 federal holidays. But two days are added as floating
bridge days; and two more for some historic reason. Recently they
passed a law limiting the work week to 35 hours. Actually it is
difficult to work only 35 hours a week. The solution: salaried employees
are required to take 3 days off every three months. So effectively
there are 53 days off.
But there is
no free lunch, and the French pay in several ways, especially in
taxes. On my pay statement there are 23 different social taxes listed
at various rates with various bases. They amount to about 17% of
my brut (gross) salary and is deducted. The remaining net salary
is the basis for the income tax. For some other reason another 3%
is deducted. But I, and everyone else, receives €42.20 for transportation.
The income tax is not withheld, though you can have it arranged
to do so. The highest rate is about 50%. Accountants for personal
returns are rare as most people must simply pay what they are told
to pay. I am not sure what my tax bill is going to be next March,
but I am sure I will be writing the biggest check of my life to
the French government.
It is hard
to understand why the French economy has not collapsed. I think
France has found the economic niche of making money doing things
inefficiently. Anyone waiting for service in a brasserie knows first
hand about inefficiency. But one still loves to be there and so
tends not to mind. I think the Argentines could come up with a very
good sparkling wine, but they could never charge $100 a bottle like
the French do for Champagne, even if it were of the same quality.
I have written
before about the importance of knowing a second language and my
study of Spanish. It would have been nice to go to Spain to continue
my studies, but c’est la vie. Now my goal while here is to learn
as much French as I can. To support the concept of second language
study I present the following quotes.
Charlemagne:
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Sir Humphrey
Davy: Language is not only the vehicle of thought, it is a great
and efficient instrument in thinking.
Johann Wolfgang
Von Goethe: Those who know nothing of foreign languages, knows
nothing of their own.
Ludwig Wittgenstein:
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat
different world.
But my favorite
and most apt is from Mark Twain after his visit to France.
Mark Twain:
In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I
never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own
language.
Speaking in
French is like being a fish out of water. Not in the sense of the
cliché of being out of place, but more literally. In fact,
you must round your lips, like a fish, and you must choke (as the
said fish is out of water so cannot breath) on the end of words
so as not to pronounce the last letters.
An old friend
of mine who runs a great bar in San Antonio called the Bombay Bicycle
Club once told me, "You can tell if it’s a good joint by the
bread." France has wonderful bread! The bread culture is representative
of the wider culture of spending resources (money and time) on food.
Almost everyone goes to the boulangerie (bakery) everyday for a
baguette. Of course the bread is baked daily. And with no preservatives
it is stale by morning. A mystery of French culture is what people
do with the stale bread.
Greetings in
France are important. You probably know about the kiss-kiss on each
cheek. For women and women, women and men, and even men and men
this is most common. A pleasure in France is to watch a group of
young women parting, everyone kissing everyone twice; their bobbing
heads reminds me of pretty chickens. But there is more about greetings
in France; a semi-formal greeting to everyone, everyday is typical.
Several workers in my building, even those who work in another department,
are sure to shake the hand and exchange a bonjour with everyone
else in the building every day, including me!
The French
must have coffee to work. If coffee is not the fuel of French industry,
it is certainly the lubricant. A strike in the Brazilian coffee
fields would no doubt be more devastating to the French economy
than a transportation strike (which are common enough anyway).
An important
component to my quality of life is a local
pub. I have found a nice little bistro near my apartment, but
even closer to the hotel I stayed at upon my arrival. Les Tontons
is a nondescript place, but the young bartender Guillaume takes
good care of me and I always seem to have a conversation. What is
bad about Les Tontons? Well, not everybody in France smokes, but
virtually everybody smokes while drinking. The bars and bistros
do not have air cleaners so the smoke can be quite thick.
One of
the comments I often heard in America is that the French hate Americans.
This joke I found on the internet is attributed to Conan O’Brien.
Q: Why don't
the French want to bomb Saddam Hussein?
A: He hates
America, he loves mistresses and he wears a beret. He is French.
I have talked
to many strangers (though I know them now) in Les Tontons. When
they understand that I am from the US they all said they like Americans
very much. Of course then the conversation often drifts toward politics
and the war, where all dislike Bush. In fact, it seems every other
night someone has bought me a drink. Though the night I was given
several kirs (white wine with the liqueur cassis) may not have been
in kindness as I had a major headache the next day.
Of course,
it helps that I dislike Bush, and for more reasons than the French
do. But I also respond that I don’t like Chirac either. What's more,
I think if France had the power of the US it would be doing as much
or more mischief around the world as the US is now. In a footnote
regarding the bombing of the Rainbow Warrior in a book
I was reading, an English author writes "Anyone with any sense
and with a knowledge of French history adopts an attitude of caution
and mistrust in dealing with the rulers of France." And for
readers of LRC, substitute any country for France.
To contradict
another stereotype, I have found that the French also have a wonderful
sense of humor and are usually happy. However, this stereotype is
understandable if one only reads French literature.
Another common
perception of France regards their war record. Two more jokes from
the internet make the point.
Q: Why do
the French call their fighter the "Mirage"?
A: Because
it's never seen in a combat zone.
Q: What do
you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up?
A: The Army.
This perception
comes from WWII but is emphasized because the French would not join
the US in Iraq, though they did fight in the first Gulf War.
Normally I
teach at Lafayette College, named after a Frenchman. The following
plaque can be found on a building close to my office.

Without the
French navy the Americans would not have won the battle at Yorktown,
and perhaps not even the war. As for courage and sacrifice, consider
the single battle of Verdun
during WWI. The number of casualties may actually be more than the
official French war history that was published in 1916 of 377,231.
Of this number 162,308 (out of a population of 42 million) were
dead or missing. Compare this number with the total number of Union
combat deaths in the American Civil War of 110,070
(out of a population of 34 million). Perhaps our country would be
less willing to jump at the solution of war after living through
such a catastrophe.
I am sure
you have read about the student demonstrations in France. LRC writers
have commented on them here,
here,
here,
and here.
In a word, the issue was tenure for new workers. I find that Americans
do not even understand the tenure system for college and university
professors. For a whole country to have tenure is incomprehensible.
For Parisians to take to the streets for serious or silly reasons
is as much cultural as political. Christopher Dawson wrote about
the Paris at the time of the French
Revolution.
For Paris
was still at heart the old city of the League and it needed no
teaching from America or England to learn the lesson of Revolution.
It remembered the night of St. Bartholomew and the killing of
Henry III, and its crowds rallied as readily to the preaching
of the new Cordeliers and the new Jacobins as to that of their
Catholic predecessors who led the mob against the Huguenots and
held the city for five years against Henry of Navarre. Already
in the days of July the people of Paris had asserted their power
in unequivocal fashion and had regained their liberty by force
of arms. Henceforward the people of Paris were an independent
power, and a power which possessed far more political self-consciousness
and revolutionary will than the people whose representatives sat
in the National Assembly.
Other famous
street revolts in Paris occurred in 1830, 1848, 1871, and 1968.
The cars burning in the suburbs last November and the student demonstrations
against the CPE (the proposed law in question) this year allow 2005
and 2006 to be added to this famous or infamous list, depending
upon your point of view. One of the demonstrations began down the
street from my apartment. A couple of hours before the scheduled
start of the march the atmosphere was more that of a carnival than
of a mob. In fact I had a nice sausage sold by one the many street
vendors who came to serve the gathering crowd. In the end, I think
the demonstrations were more about the ambitions of the connected
power players, both the politicians and the leaders of the syndicates
(like unions but more powerful and integrated into society than
in the US) that organized them.
Sabine Barnhart
has written eloquently about traveling.
Traveling
is a personal challenge that many men still want to experience.
It’s the last frontier to break away from the old familiar ways
and discover something new. The renewal generally brought progress
to man. He returned with new technology, medicine, music, poetry
and goods. Sometimes he discovered these things in another land,
or he found it at the edge of his own universe – in his mind.
But what he conquered and discovered; he owned his experience.
This personal and very private knowing is something that could
not ever be stolen and taken from him. It’s an eternal gift that
would carry him through his entire life and shape his character.
As this is
true for traveling, it is even more so for living abroad. For me
to soak up the French culture, both the wine and the socialist brine,
has been wonderful and interesting. And now that spring has arrived
all hearts are beating faster in Paris. The long sunny days and
flowers make it is easy to forget the long dreary winter, politics,
economics and work. The mind instead turns to love; perhaps this
is dangerous, but it is obvious why the Parisians are now smiling
as they dreamily look into each other’s eyes.
May
3, 2006
Ira
Katz [send him mail] teaches
mechanical engineering at Lafayette College. He is the co-author
of Handling
Mr. Hyde: Questions and Answers about Manic Depression and
Introduction
to Fluid Mechanics.
Copyright
© 2006 LewRockwell.com
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