Just as various sick puppies last week justified the USSA’s torture, so an assortment of equally nauseating dogs are yapping about the “murders” of two of the NYPD’s warrriors. (Intriguing that the corporate media never applies the word “murder” to cops’ victims, such as Eric Garner or Tamir Rice. Apparently, its reporters and editors have imbibed the circular reasoning of the USSA’s Department of [In]Justice: “the use of deadly force against a police officer is almost never justified, while the use of deadly force by police often is… [K]illings by police are referred to as ‘justifiable homicides,’ and the persons that police kill are referred to as ‘felons.’”)

At any rate, Jay Stephenson sends this horrifying propaganda from Howard Safir, formerly the NYPD’s don. Again, just as she did last week, Your Intrepid Reporter has waded through this infuriating, deceptive and illogical tripe so that you don’t have to. (Note to all the masochists out there: I strongly advise grabbing a barf-bag before you dive in.)

Safir (was ever a man more misnamed?) begins by lamenting, rather than celebrating, the fact that “Anti-Police Rhetoric [Is] Unlike Anything I’ve Seen in 45 Years.” Apparently, when cops murder us, we must be courteous and restrained in our “rhetoric.”

Ah, but it’s not our rhetoric concerning Safir: after all, we’re unimportant, expendable serfs. No, it’s the “rhetoric” from Obummer, Eric “The Red” Holder, and Bill “Redder than Eric” de Blasio, New York City’s First Comrade, that worry our columnist. Cheer up there, Howie: these guys are all as authoritarian as you. They love cops and the loot these highway robbers transfer to their coffers from our pockets, despite their political pandering to the contrary. You can rest assured that at the end of the day, they’ll have strengthened police powers, not reduced them by so much as an iota.

Typical, isn’t it, that Howie sees us merely as biddable peons. We aren’t intelligent enough to extrapolate from our own experience and study. No, we loathe cops only because Our Rulers haven’t extravagantly praised the assassins of Michael Brown and Eric Garner.

Howie relies on the hackneyed and easily disproved lie that cops are out there protecting us rather than bashing expectant mothers into the sidewalk, slaughtering the family dog, and stealing what’s left of our after-tax dollars in ticket and fines. He also piously advises that when “serious incidents of police abuse or misjudgment…take place we should investigate them thoroughly and prosecute and punish those who committed the wrong doing.” What a wit, huh?

This cretin also suggests that “the President should declare a national day of Support for Police.” I guess a week isn’t enough, let alone the months we slave to pay the salaries and very generous perks of these murderous parasites.

The Best of Becky Akers