Debate? Feh! Who needs it?!

People have asked me if I plan to watch the presidential debate tonight. I can’t. No TV! HOORAY! Well, are you going to listen to it on the radio? NOPE! I shall be in meditation while this scripted farce is being played out on the stage. Excuse me, but does anyone realize that these “debates” are all scripted and rehearsed? People tune in because they want to hear Trump sock it to Hillary or Hillary sock it to Trump. Hey, people, the only one who’s going to get anything “socked” is YOU. What, you think your taxes are going to go down? Or ObamaCare will get scrapped? Or we’ll stay out of wars in the Middle East? Or jobs besides “barista” will suddenly become available? That this nuclear-armed Third World reality show will become “great” again? Come on, man, does anyone remember the past SIXTEEN YEARS at all??!!

Debates, uh huh, right. A presidential debate is two burglars arguing about whether to jimmy open a window or force open the back door to break into a house and steal everything in sight. This is like a debate between two cola companies, complete with commercials featuring people with teeth so white you could guide a supertanker away from fog-enshrouded shoals with one smile. This is like the 1970s “debate” between who had better margarine. Then we found out both were equally dangerous to one’s health, even with logos featuring joggers and cardiograms. Or the debate between the governments of the U.S. and the USSR as to which one was more intelligent. We never got a “none of the above” category for any of this shibai.

Does anyone know that the SAME people that script the cola and margarine commercials also script these debates? They’re not “running a campaign”, they’re selling a candidate. Right, last year, they convinced everyone to buy the latest car that, later, would get a stuck accelerator and plow into the rear of a dump truck. Oops! This year, they’ll convince everyone to buy a candidate that will get a stuck ego and plow us all into the back of doomsday or another Great Depression. Gosh, and people want to sit and listen to the sales pitch?! People, they’re not even giving away free refrigerator magnets!

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12:45 pm on September 26, 2016