Are You a Military Idolater?

Military idolatry is the essence of American civil religion and has been since 9/11.

It doesn’t matter where the troops go, why they go where they go, how long they stay where they go, whether they should go in the first place, what they do when they are there, how much it costs to keep them there, how much collateral damage they cause while there, how many widows and orphans they make while there, how much infrastructure they destroy when they are there, how many atrocities they commit while there, how many terrorists they recruit by being there, or whether whatever “good” they accomplish is worth the shedding of one drop of American blood—members of the military, and veterans, are all but worshipped by a great many Americans. It wouldn’t surprise me if some military idolaters fell prostate at the feet of soldiers returning from Afghanistan and thanked them profusely for defending their freedoms and keeping them safe from terrorists.

But one does not have to go that far to be a military idolater. The following test is designed to determine to what degree, if any, that you are a military idolater. King James, His Bible,... Laurence M. Vance Buy New $19.95 (as of 11:36 UTC - Details)

  1. Do you thank men in uniform for their service?
  2. Do you get goose bumps when you see military jets fly over sporting events?
  3. Do you applaud military personnel when they are recognized on airline flights?
  4. Do you think it is just a few bad apples in the military who have committed atrocities in Iraq and Afghanistan?
  5. Do you like it when businesses post signs imploring their customers to support the troops?
  6. Do you like it when churches show video tributes to the troops during the morning worship service on the Sunday before Veterans Day?
  7. Do you think all colleges should offer ROTC?
  8. Do you think businesses should give discounts to veterans and active duty military personnel?
  9. Do you think that President Obama has gutted the military?
  10. Do you believe the U.S. Navy is a global force for good?
  11. Do you think that military values are good values for all Americans?
  12. Do you like the idea of veterans and military personnel getting free or discounted meals at restaurants on Veterans Day?
  13. Do you consider the military a great place to teach young people discipline?
  14. Do you think it is important that all young men have to register for Selective Service?
  15. Did you enjoy the American Sniper movie about Chris Kyle?
  16. Do you think that military recruiters should be allowed in high schools?
  17. Do you think that the defense budget should be increased?
  18. Do you think that if the United States had not intervened in World War II then we would all be speaking German? War, Christianity, and... Laurence M. Vance Best Price: $8.95 Buy New $9.95 (as of 09:10 UTC - Details)
  19. Do you think the military did a just and necessary thing when it dropped the atomic bombs on Japan?
  20. Do you like seeing church signs that say: “Pray for Our Troops”?
  21. Do you attend Veterans Day parades?
  22. Do you like the idea of military chaplains speaking during church services?
  23. Do you hang an American flag outside of your house on Veterans Day?
  24. Do you think that the defense budget should be tied to the nation’s GDP?
  25. Do you think the slogan about people joining the Army, traveling the world, meeting interesting people, and then killing them is funny?
  26. Do you think it is okay that the military sponsors race cars like Tony Schumacher’s top fuel dragster?
  27. Do you smile when you see bumper stickers that say: “God Bless Our Troops, but Especially Our Snipers”?
  28. Do you like it when churches recognize veterans and active duty military personnel on the Sunday of or the Sunday before national holidays?
  29. Do you believe that U.S. troops were and are fighting for our freedoms in Iraq and Afghanistan?
  30. Do you believe that U.S. troops should remain in Germany, Japan, and Italy even though World War II ended over 70 years ago?
  31. Do you smile when you see bumper stickers that say: “If You Can Read This, Thank a Teacher; If You Can Read This in English, Thank a Marine”?
  32. Do you think it is un-American to criticize the actions of U.S. troops?
  33. Do you consider members of the military to be heroes? War, Empire, and the M... Laurence M. Vance Best Price: $5.24 Buy New $9.79 (as of 09:10 UTC - Details)
  34. Do you watch “salute to the military” celebrations and musical “all-star salutes” to the troops?
  35. Do you like it when veterans and active duty military personnel wear their uniforms to church on the Sunday before Veterans Day?
  36. Do you say “amen” when you see a church sign saying that U.S. soldiers die for our freedoms like Christ died for our sins?
  37. Does it bring a tear to your eye when you see banners in airports welcoming home U.S. troops?
  38. Do you believe that veterans should be honored?
  39. Do you think joining the military is a good career choice for young people?
  40. Do you get chills down your spine when you see a military color guard from the local base walking down the main aisle of your church on the Sunday before Veterans Day?
  41. Do you like the idea of businesses giving hiring preferences to Veterans?
  42. Do you think that U.S. soldiers need to fight “over there” so we don’t have to fight “over here”?
  43. Do you think it is a great idea when churches have special military appreciation services?
  44. Do you like it when store clerks ask for donations to help veterans?
  45. Do you like commercials for the military on television?
  46. Do you enjoy it when the pianist at your church plays the song of each branch of the military during the offering on the Sunday before Veterans Day?
  47. Do you think it is a good thing when schools have Veterans Day programs?
  48. Do you like it when churches list the names of all the veterans in the church in their church bulletins on the Sunday before Veterans Day?
  49. Do you think that the number of incidents of sexual assault in the military are inflated?
  50. Do you say “amen” when your church offers up special prayers for the troops?

The number of “yes” answers you have shows to what degree you are a military idolater. I have none, and hope you have the same.