THE BALLAD OF RICK PERRY
By Richard Cummings
Do we need another cowboy in the White House,
Tottin’ six guns and a swagger for a walk-
A rootin’, tootin, cowboy
With a Bush-like folksy talk?
Rick Perry is a Texan in his heart,
He’s fightin’ mad and ready for a war.
He’s never seen a war he didn’t like
With blood and death and gore.
From Afghanistan to Libya
From Iraq to Timbuktu,
From Yemen and Somalia
He’s ready to send me and you.
But there’s another Texan we can trust
And his name is Dr. Paul
He’s had enough of stupid wars
With their moronic patriotic call.
But they say that Paul don’t stand a chance
Because he has no swagger like Rick Perry
And he refuses to be macho,
Droppin’ bombs while making merry.
But the GOP know what it wants-
A hero just like Ronald Reagan
Only with that famous Texan draw.
And one who acts just like a pagan.
So if you’re lookin for a war in Paraguay
Or Lebanon or some place far away-
Rich Perry is the guy you’ll want-
And believe me he will make them pay.
He’ll be fightin’ in Pakistan, Ethiopia and Peru
To make America safe without a care
He’ll turn the war on terrorism
Into something well beyond repair.
So let’s shout it for Rick Perry
The man that everybody loves-
That rootin’, tootin’ shootin’ cowboy
Who ain’t no freakin’, stinkin’ dove.