Would Satan Drive?
Here are some
certainly has the scratch necessary to acquire a seven figure
chariot of hellfire like the $1.7 million, 16-cylinder, 1,000-horsepower
Bugatti super supercar. And with four turbochargers, all-wheel-drive
and a top-speed of more than 250 mph, the Veyron has what it takes
to run with the devil.
Truly faster and more furious than a plague of locusts; Ill
It takes almost
as much gas to keep this bad boy running down Corollas as it does
souls in torment to stoke the flames of the Eternal Pit. Whether
its rooster-tailing through an endangered species delicate
habitat or spewing brimstone into the skies and lungs of the damned,
the always outre Hummers more than up to the job.
I have to deal with pretty rocky terrain sometimes in my neighborhood;
and theres plenty of extra room for my minions.
get especially good mileage. Its slower than cars that do
get good gas mileage and it costs two or three times as much
as a normal economy car that also gets better gas mileage. What
could possibly be more more diabolical? Plus, its ugly!
Fooled ya again!
ugly one. Maybe not quite Body by Plymouth,
well, you know who. But, close enough. That
gangster-grinning front end is the ideal final sight for wayward
pedestrians and spandex-clad would-be Tour de Francers unlucky enough
to get in His way.
Watch out all you Lance Armstrong wannabees; and make mine
life may work for ol goodie-two-sandals, but our guy
likes to live large. And with worldly delights that include back
seats like Barcaloungers that allow their occupants to fully recline,
sued-textured feather-stuffed pillows, a refrigerator/mini bar and
(of course) lambs wool carpeting, its the perfect mobile
lounge for discussing the terms and conditions of the sale of your
Trumps got nothing on me, riding around in that low-rent
Prom Night Special Town Car stretch hes got. Get a better
Why not give them a preview of whats to come? The inspiration
for this cars damnation alley styling had to come from
the Nether regions and wherever it travels, there will always
be much wailing and gnashing of teeth.
No! Keep it away! I repent! You win. Ok?
with permission from EricPetersAutos.com.
[send him mail] is an
automotive columnist and author of Automotive
Atrocities and Road Hogs (2011). Visit his
© 2011 Eric Peters
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