Bam, Whack, Pow

by Burton S. Blumert

In a startling piece of investigative journalism, Jack Newfield (New York Post: March 20, 2000) reveals that the so-called "sport of boxing" is corrupt. Reeling from that shock, the reader braces himself for the next revelation: the New York State Athletic Commission (supposedly boxing’s watchdog) is a "cesspool of patronage and incompetence."

This hard-hitting expose is what Pulitzer Prizes are made of, and it’s rumored Newfield’s next explosive piece will disclose that New York City has a traffic problem.

Boxing has also drawn the attention of political heavyweights. Senator John McCain (R-AZ), before he adopted campaign finance reform as his mantra, was urging federal guidelines to govern the sport. There was even a movement afoot to make McCain US Boxing Czar.

Listen, you bozos, leave boxing alone.

There is a refreshing quality about the world of boxing and the commissions that govern it. The corruption is pure and unadulterated.

The road to ascendancy in the world of boxing has no moral detours. For those who rise to the top, a stretch at Sing Sing is more valued than an Ivy League degree (and the alumni connections more useful). A murder indictment is equivalent to a graduate degree (see the bio of impresario Don King).

There is no waste of resources in locating members for the athletic commission. The marketplace assigns a dollar value on each appointment and the only concern is that the bills are unmarked.

As with every facet of the sport, money drives the engine. However, when money isn’t enough to get the desired result, violence is employed quickly and efficiently (usually outside the ring).

Hypocrisy is unknown in the world of boxing. Who cares about the stumble-bums the state agency is supposed to be protecting? Victims-schmictims. "Let’s get ready to rumble," as the man says.

To the charge that boxing is just as phony as wrestling, I submit that that observation is rubbish. Wrestling makes a mockery of such noble American traditions as fixing the outcome, and where boxing involves true violence, wrestling simulates it with ketchup and break-away chairs.

Actually, the New York State Athletic Commission should be a model for all government agencies. No political correctness, no transparent efforts to appear judicious, and a disdain for the art of subtlety.

And, by the way the taxpayers manage to get a few laughs for their money.

March 22, 2000

Burton S. Blumert, president of the Center for Libertarian Studies, is a long-time boxing fan. He attended one of the crooked matches Newfield mentions at Madison Square Garden with Lew Rockwell. Needless to say, they rooted for the guy who lost, a boxer who was hammered by a man who outweighed his junior welterweight class by 19 lbs.