Say “Please” Before You Break Down My Door!

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My congressman can’t tell me whether or not I’m on the government’s “watch list,” or “no-fly list,” or “enemies list,” or whatever they call it. Well, after this post, he might have more confidence in telling me “yes you are!” (Press 2 for Spanish: ¡Sí Amigo!)

I know a lot for folks who work for the agencies and departments that are now subsumed in the monstrous Department of Homeland Security (DHS). Not one of them thinks it works, and most of them call the Department — and Chertoff’s “management” of it — a disaster. They are unhappy in the extreme, waiting fitfully until they can retire. They complain that they are forced to work overtime, and are subject to the whim of mangers in a new structure that is totally opaque and claims to authority which are arbitrary and capricious.

Now you can perhaps understand why a U.S. border guard pepper-sprayed a Canadian going to his second home in the state of Washington because the Canadian — apparently a gentleman — told the officer to say “please” when giving an arbitrary command. And you can understand why Chertoff’s goons warmly commended the thug, and not the gentleman.
The Canadian gentleman should send DHS a hefty bill for trying to educate the goon — after all, favored “consultants” get ten thousand dollars a day for giving bureaucrats endless mandatory “seminars” on how not to offend minorities, diversity addicts, and other varieties of government-favored populations and gender variations; but not one word is spent on human qualities such as courtesy, respect, honesty, and simple humanity (I employ the the term as it was understood by Shakespeare, not Brezhnev).

All of these overworked, irritable, and over-seminared goons would be pleasant neighbors if they just worked at the local hardware store. However, they think that a government job raises their I.Q. by thirty points and gives them the authority to push other people around. Add to that this sad but undeniable and central fact: most of them hate their boss and their jobs, and are just waiting to retire after twenty years on a taxpayer-guaranteed pension whose rise is impervious to market fluctuation.

The Moral of the Story: is the Child Protection Services coming to take your kids because your homeschool curriculum does not include “diversity-based sex education”? Is the ATF coming to take your guns because Obama says only the government (and criminals, of course) should have guns? Does “Social Services” want to inspect your house before you are **allowed** to care for your sick spouse at home?

Well, now. Here’s what NOT to tell them as they break down your door: “Say ‘please’!” (Hat tip to Drudge)

8:08 am on March 4, 2009