Neocon Medicine

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You may think, as I did, that neo-conservative insights primarily apply to foreign policy. But after a partially sleepless night due to terrible coughing from a cold, I have had a flash of insight! Neo-conservative ideology is just as applicable to dealing with germs and viruses as with Islamo-Fascists.

You see my wife has urged me to stop eating sweets while I am sick (I have a legendary sweet tooth) because she alleges that the sugar will prolong the sickness. What I realized is that she is merely expressing an attitude of appeasement. To stop eating sugar is exactly what the germs want! They hate my joyful, chocolate cookie filled way of life. These germs must not be appeased but must be defeated! If I stop eating sugar now, what of the terrible night I had last night? Will I not be dishonoring that great sacrifice by giving in to the germs? No, thanks to the wisdom of the Neocons, I will soldier on undaunted, unthinking and unchanging.

9:07 am on August 17, 2005