Interesting interview with Judith Martin: Civility in a Democracy: A Conversation with Miss Manners. Her comments on the interplay and difference between etiquette, manners, morals, and law is fascinating:

Etiquette is older than law and even now divides the realm of regulating behavior with the legal system. There are a lot of problems with that these days because people keep trying to turn over matters of etiquette to the legal system, which doesn’t handle them very well.

…
Cole: You draw a distinction between etiquette and manners and morals, right?

Martin: Yes. I also draw a distinction between manners and etiquette, manners being the principles which are eternal, and etiquette being the surface behavior, which varies and changes.

Manners have a moral basis. Manners are to etiquette as morality is to the law. Matters of serious morality have to be handled by the law because etiquette depends on the consent of the people practicing it. It has no punishment other than social disapproval–on up to shunning–which can be powerful, but it’s not as powerful as throwing someone in jail.

Reminds me of Hazlitt’s aphorism “manners are minor morals“.

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