If I Sign Multiple Times, Will They Deport Me Faster?

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So the creeps at the Weekly Standard want to strip secessionists of their citizenship and deport them, huh, Lew? Great! I’m gonna sign my name in letters larger than Mr. Hancock’s on the Declaration they so spurn. I’ve been looking into expatriation and renouncing my citizenship — how glorious to be free of paying my “fair share” towards worldwide murder and mayhem, let alone being liberated of the moral culpability! — but Our totalitarian Rulers make both awfully difficult. If the cretins at Weak Standards want to help me out, that’s terrific! In fact, I’ll not only sign the petitions for secession, I’ll sign Weak Standards’ one on deportation as well.

8:45 pm on November 13, 2012