Even If I Were a Demopublican, I Wouldn’t Endure This Just To Vote

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I don’t stand in line for anything. Not for new restaurants that are all the rage, not for movies, not even for the newest iPhone, and certainly not for gate-rape at airports. So when friends who are handing out flyers for Gary Johnson at the polls report that the lines are horrific, I am once again overjoyed to be an anarchist. One such volunteer estimated that voters would wait at least 90 minutes — almost as long as passengers did for New Jersey’s buses yesterday.

Can the State do nothing efficiently? Why, in this computerized age, do its minions drag folks out of their homes and offices for this silly charade? And then — get this — the lickspittles at NPR gloat that “turnout is heavy!” No, it’s just that Leviathan can’t handle even the simple process of casting a ballot, something my fifth-grade class achieved without any trouble at all when we elected Billy Rogers president.

Then again, I guess sheeple who legitimize the State deserve nothing less than to suffer yet again its jaw-dropping ineptitude.

4:23 pm on November 6, 2012