Black Helicopters Over Miami

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Oh, for the innocent days of 1993, when reports of “black helicopter” sightings were generally dismissed as symptoms of mass derangement. Residents of Miami’s Brickell neighborhood “saw and heard several military-style, `pitch-black’ helicopters flying around and hovering on top of [various] buildings” for several hours beginning on — all the inauspicious days — the evening of April 19, reports the Miami Herald. At least three of the vehicles, described as Black Hawk-style choppers, landed in a parking lot and “then charged over the Brickell and Miami river area. Men who appeared to be SWAT team members were also seen” taking part in the operation.

“Turns out that it was a training exercise by the Southeast Regional Domestic Security Task Force,” continued the report. “In other words, a Homeland Security operation, that few other authorities apparently knew about, including the U.S. Coast Guard.”

A spokesman for the Miami-Dade Police Department told the Herald that the military helicopters were involved in “an `operational’ training drill” but insisted that he “was not allowed to comment on details of the drill.” The story dutifully quotes a properly subservient local Mundane named Neilson Paty, who “said he is understanding of the city having its reasons to not inform residents about the drill and that he is not upset for not getting any alerts of the commotion.”

With black helicopters plying the skies above American cities, “stealth choppers” reportedly being used by presidential assassination teams, and ninja-suited death squads swarming the countryside, it appears that reality has caught up with Jerry Fletcher’s world.

9:46 am on May 14, 2011