A Modest Foreign Policy Proposal

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In light of the recent nearly unanimous vote in the U.S. House of Representatives to “enhance” our already incestuously-close relationship with the government of Israel, I would like to make a modest proposal: Move the entire U.S. military establishment, Pentagon and all, along with the U.S. Congress, to Israel and let the Israelis pay for it. Since I’ve been told by my government my entire life that the politicians in Israel are “my closest ally,” I’m perfectly certain that they would surely act as our Big Brother and protect us militarily if we ever needed protecting.

But then again, try as I might, I can’t think of a single thing this “ally” has ever done for me, or any other American citizen, in my 57 years. Isn’t an alliance a two-way street? Isn’t it supposed to be mutually beneficial? Wadda I know. I know they’ve made a lot of Muslims hate us, and that a lot of “neoconservative” Republicans consider that to be a good thing, and I know a lot of defense contractors have made billions from their connections with my greatest ally, but beyond that I just can’t think of anything my greatest ally has done for me. 

Gotta go; I’m busy this morning looking for the section of the U.S. Constitution that empowers Congress to spend tax dollars to “defend” foreign countries.

UPDATE: Chris B. writes: “While debating the Republican party platform at my county convention the ubiquitous “Support Israel” issue came up (at least twice) . . . . The resolution called for continued ‘military and economic support’ for our ‘only ally in the region’ and the ‘only democracy in the Middle East’ . . . . I motioned to amend the resolution to include the phrase ‘subject to the authorities and limitations of the Constitution.’ It failed. Massively. Not even close. Oddly enough about half of the convention left at that point, having passed the Israel resolution. The Ron Paul delegation went on to trounce the remaining GOP establishment on each and every resolution.”

7:19 am on May 15, 2012