Lew:  such a division brings to mind the elderly “Home Guard” crowd in Great Britain, who showed up – usually in some comedic role – in old WWII films/detective shows.  I can also envision such people garbed in medieval battle-dress – complete with spears, shields, cat-o’-nine-tails, and suits of armor – just like Peter Sellers in that wonderful film, The Mouse That Roared.  They could patrol shopping malls – the most likely site of a “terrorist” attack, given that the “enemy’s” major grievance has to do with our commercially-driven lifestyles.

The neocon promoters of such a scheme would (a) be in command of the entire platoon – are there  enough stars with which to decorate their uniforms? Five-star generals would not be enough: what about six or seven-star?, and (b) such commanders would, as at present, not be required to be at the front lines of any ensuing battle.  These lounge-lizard-lancers – who, like their modern counterparts have never heard a shot fired in anger – might desert their posts were they to face hostile forces.

Now all we need is a shoulder-patch for their uniforms!

The Best of Butler Shaffer