Obesity
and Global Warming: A Catch-22?
by
David Dieteman
What
to do, what to do. The do-gooders of the world fret over global
warming, and they fret about obesity.
What goes unnoticed in these campaigns for justice in health and
the environment is that six billion overweight people might keep
a lot of carbon out of the atmosphere.
In
fact, the more overweight people there are (and the more overweight
they are), the better off the planet may be.
(Note:
I am sorry for the moralizing word "over"weight. There
is, of course, no truth about anything, there are only differences.
But "over"weight is commonly accepted, and one man can
only do so much. Besides, an article about the need for "massive"
people just does not have the same ring).
Consider
the following statistics. If all six billion people on the face
of the earth were to gain just one pound, that is six billion pounds.
If all six billion people gain ten pounds, that is sixty billion
pounds of human body matter.
Before
you fear that this weight gain will throw the planet out of orbit,
please consider that the weight gained by the hungry humans would
be weight taken from the earth, in the form of food, and thus not
weight added to the earth which might throw the planet into the
sun. (This paragraph is particularly directed at Al Gore, whose
execrable book, Earth
in the Balance, takes a rather imbalanced approach to "science.")
How
much carbon is in the average pound of average human body matter?
Supposing that human beings are composed of water, bone, muscle,
and fat, plus organ tissues (veins, livers, etc.), plus hair, an
average figure should be available.
Perhaps
governments should also mandate very long hair - hair just above
the ground, so that no one trips and requires money for medical
care - to trap yet more carbon. Very long fingernails might be required
for persons who do not require the use of their hands at work, and
for persons in comas. Extra-long toenails might be considered for
persons in comas, and the carbon in the leather and cotton that
would otherwise go into shoes and socks can stay locked up in cows
and cotton plants. For that matter, perhaps all animals should be
made as fat as possible.
Human
beings, however, will do the most good for the earth, due to the
fact that when we all weigh 700 pounds or so, we will require larger
amounts of clothing, thus trapping yet more carbon. The cholesterol
lining human arteries must also contain at least some carbon,
and is thus beneficial to the earth.
At
this point, an environmentalist might complain that all these heavyweight
men, women, and cattle will require more food, and that this will
necessitate the chopping down of more trees for more farmland, which
will put more carbon in the atmosphere, heat up the earth even further,
and burn us all to a crisp, perhaps exterminating life on earth.
Well,
so what? If, as Peter Singer claims, "a dog is a rat is a pig
is a boy" (I paraphrase), and human life is not worth anything
beyond a rat, who cares if we are all so much cinder floating in
space? Why care about the rats, for that matter? Surely, no matter
how hot mankind makes the atmosphere, global warming cannot actually
cause the planet to explode into asteroids. The earth will still
be here to be here. And that is what environmentalism is all about.
If
the do-gooders of the globe are serious about preventing global
warming, they should follow their own logic, and at least study
whether a planet of government-mandated 700-pound people might not
save us all from global warming. On the other hand, perhaps, if
we are all dangerously overweight, we might suck too much carbon
out of the atmosphere, somehow extinguishing animal life in the
process. Doesn’t anyone care? I’m going out for a couple of cheeseburgers.
January
26, 2001
Mr.
Dieteman is an attorney in Erie, Pennsylvania, and a PhD candidate
in philosophy at The Catholic University of America.
©
2001 David Dieteman
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