The Drudge Report has a major story and photo of Olympic “hero” Michael Phelps smoking marijuana while at a party in Columbia, South Carolina. According to a news account:

As he basked in his hero status, Phelps knocked back beers and shots of spirits. And when a student offered him the glass bong engraved with red writing, he did not hesitate, says our source.

The 6ft 4ins athlete, in a white T-shirt and navy cap worn back to front, clasped the device in his huge hands and inhaled deeply.

Our source said: “You could tell Michael had smoked before. He grabbed the bong and a lighter and knew exactly what to do.

“He looked just as natural with a bong in his hands as he does swimming in the pool. He was the gold medal winner of bong hits. Michael ended up getting a little paranoid, though, because before too long he looked like he was nervous and ran out of the place.”

Since there is photographic evidence of Phelps smoking pot and because there were witnesses, it is obvious that if the government is going to be consistent, Phelps needs to be arrested, tried, and sent to prison for a long, long time.

Or, maybe an ambitious federal prosecutor might convene a grand jury to investigate drug use among athletes, subpoena Phelps, and then charge him with perjury afterward. Aw, we know that federal prosecutors never would stoop to such tactics.