I don't know if the casting has been completed for the filming of Ayn Rand's "Atlas Shrugged." If not, I would like to recommend Michael Chertoff to play the role of Wesley Mouch. He should jump at the chance, were it offered to him, since a career as an entertainer seems to be the prime qualification to hold high public office.

Chertoff has also exhibited his talents for scaring people with bogus threats and fears. Speaking in Chicago the other day, Chertoff warned of possible terrorist attacks, grounding his concerns not in evidence, but in his "gut feeling." He worries that the lack of any concrete evidence for his gut-conceived bogeymen is making Americans complacent. Were people to catch on to the cozy little racket in which Chertoff and the rest of the political establishment are engaged, the possibility might arise that the public (gasp!) would no longer support the need for a Homeland Security. Chertoff and others might be forced to (gasp!) find genuine, productive work in the marketplace for which their "talents" might go unrewarded. And so, as Americans prepare for a summer of relaxation at beaches, Chertoff will be there to remind them of the fears and threats that churn themselves up from his gut. Perhaps such feelings are little more than remnants of some spicy foods consumed at a summer picnic!

Ah, but if Chertoff is cast as Wesley Mouch - a role that would fit his talents - he could at least take comfort in the residuals he would receive from future showings of "Atlas Shrugged." Perhaps that thought, alone, might ease the "gut feelings" that are causing him so much discomposure.