Homeland Security: Pretty Much All Bodily Movement Is an Indicator of Potential Terrorism

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If you thought the criteria for suspicious activity in terms of potential terrorism couldn't get any more broad and ludicrous, prepare to be taken aback.

The culture of citizen spying and pervasive paranoia in the United States is getting to the point of patent absurdity, yet somehow many American nonsensically seem to continue to treat it as gospel.

According to a document entitled u201CTerrorism Awareness and Prevention: Participant Guideu201D distributed by the New Jersey Office of Homeland Security & Preparedness (which you can see embedded below), almost every single action should be treated as suspicious.

These include glances, wide open eyes, cold penetrating stares, trance-like gazes, exaggerated yawning when engaged in conversation, protruding or beating neck arteries, repetitive touching of face, tugging on or covering ears, increased breathing rate, panting, excessive fidgeting, clock watching, head turning, pacing or jumpiness, trembling, unusual perspiration, goose bumps, and/or rigid posture with minimal body movements and arms close to sides.

In other words, if you're late for something or in a rush (u201Cexcessive fidgeting, clock watchingu201D), you might be a terrorist. If you've been exercising (u201Cincreased breathing rate, panting,u201D u201Cprotruding or beating neck arteriesu201D), you might be a terrorist.

On the other hand, if you're tired (u201Ctrance-like gaze,u201D u201Cexaggerated yawningu201D) you also might be a terrorist. Yet, if you're energetic or perhaps drank too much coffee (u201Cwide open u2018flashbulb eyes,'u201D u201Cpacing or jumpy,u201D u201Ctrembling,u201D u201Cunusual perspiration,u201D u201Cexcessive fidgetingu201D), you might also be a terrorist.

You'd better not be too energetic, too tired, in a rush, plagued by a wide range of medical conditions, returning from exercise, or generally display almost any bodily behaviors as someone might consider you a suspicious person and report you for possible terrorist activity.

But it doesn't stop there! Other suspicious activities when it comes to vehicles are u201Cunusual behavior,u201D which is undefined and could mean just about anything, u201Csigns of fear or stress,u201D or u201Crefusal or disregard of directions.u201D

It gets even more insane when they go over signs which make a vehicle itself suspicious. These include, u201CUnusual items clearly visible inside or attached to the outside [of the vehicle],u201D u201Cstopped or parked in strange or out-of-place locations,u201D u201Cparked close to agency assets such as terminals, rail lines and bridges,u201D u201Cmissing or altered license plates,u201D u201Cvisibly overloaded or sagging.u201D

This means that the ultimate potential terrorist might be someone who has a brand new truck with temporary tags overloaded with paint removal equipment or anything else u201Cunusualu201D or with an off-road driving kit on the outside who happens to be stopped in an u201Cout-of-placeu201D location, perhaps in order to go hiking, or maybe parked near a bridge, perhaps to remove graffiti.

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