Making Hash of the TSA

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"We have
posted signs on our doors basically saying that [employees of the
Transportation Security Administration (TSA)] aren't allowed to
come into our business," says
a woman calling herself KC McLawson
who works at "a cafe
near Seattle-Tacoma International Airport." She and her boss,
the policy's author, became instant heroes after KC contacted "consumer
advocate and journalist
" Christopher Elliott and pseudonymously
discussed the restaurant's resolve: "Their kind aren't welcomed
in our establishment."

And you can
see why: if McD's
is responsible for clumsy customers
who scald themselves spilling
coffee, restaurateurs are surely liable when thugs notorious nationwide
for sexual assault suddenly throw down their forks mid-meal and
attack the gals in the next booth.

Nor does rape
exhaust the evil in which the TSA's sociopaths typically indulge.
They
also steal
, so it's likely they'd sneak out without paying their
tabs — after picking the pockets of the couple at the table behind
them. They
make little kids cry
and savage
the elderly
; what host in these tough times can afford to let
a few ruffians terrorize the rest of his patrons? And true to its
Hitlerian credo, the TSA hurts and humiliates anyone weak in either
mind or body, those who are ill and those recovering.

Indeed, our
noble restaurateurs may have witnessed one such incident in their
own backyard: when "Anchorage
state Rep. Sharon Cissna
" tried to fly out of Sea-Tac last
Sunday following "medical treatment," the TSA forced this
survivor of cancer through its porno-scanner. Then its perverts
threatened to grope her anyway — as they had three months earlier.
But one experience with the “invasive, probing hands of a stranger”
had been more than enough. "I began to remember what my husband
and I’d decided after the previous intensive physical search,"
Cissna stated. "That I never had to submit to that horror again!
It would be difficult, we agreed, but I had the choice to say no,
this twisted policy did not have to be the price of flying to Juneau!”

Actually,
ma'am, sexual assault is indeed the price of flying to Juneau —
you sensibly refused to pay it, so instead you "travel[ed]
north from Seattle
by car, small plane and the Alaska state
ferry system." Which is hardly a "choice," anymore
than the mugger in an alley allows you to "choose" whether
you'll give him your money or your life. But hey, you're a politician,
so close enough for government work.

Given the TSA's
enthusiasm for crimes and atrocities, then, as well as the risks
of proximate liability in this litigious age, our unnamed restaurateur
is prudent to forbid its henchmen his premises. The wonder is that
more entrepreneurs haven't.

But are signs
on the door enough? After all, the TSA shamelessly goes everywhere
it's not wanted. So what happens when its bullies ignore orders
against trespassing as deafly and deftly as they do shrieks from
passengers? "If [my boss] sees a TSA agent come in," KC
explains, "we turn our backs and completely ignore them, and
tell them to leave."

Yeehaw! Praise
God for such patriots! If enough of us follow suit, if we refuse
to deal with the TSA's goons professionally and socially, the agency
will find fewer and fewer deviants willing to don its brown-sorry,
its blue shirts.

American colonists
relied on a similar tactic in the 1760's and 1770's: tarring and
feathering. Though we tend to dismiss it as a quaint practical joke,
tarring and feathering was actual, physical torture. The boiling
tar severely burned its target; it could blind him if it hit his
eyes and permanently injure those areas the TSA gropes.

Not surprisingly,
when tarring and feathering became the cost of taking the King's
shilling, men thought twice before doing so. But we need not rip
up our pillows nor haul out the tar-pots. We can accomplish the
same thing with our boycott — don't fly the commercial airlines,
for any reason at any time — and ostracism.

If you own
a company, refuse to buy from or sell to anyone affiliated with
the TSA. Do your competitors deal with the agency? Advertise the
fact that you don't.

And all of
us can socially ostracize the TSA's criminals — as well as Leviathan's
lackeys in general. Decent people certainly don't invite pedophiles,
thieves, and murderers to their homes; they don't allow their children
to play with their kids nor, later, to marry them; they protest
their presence on committees and refuse to serve beside them; they
glare rather than saying "hello" when passing one on the
streets of a small town. The State has long been our direst enemy;
it's past time we treated its minions as such.

Meanwhile,
Christopher Elliott is doing his best to out the lady who contacted
him; you can read his speculations about her real name on his blog,
but I shan't repeat them here. Yes, I'm a bad journalist and no,
I don't care: in this case, identifying the source and her restaurant
to verify that she's correct and truthful matters less than the
brilliant, brave blackballing she advocates: "she
hopes telling her story
will raise awareness of the anger felt
by small businesses across America toward the TSA. u2018Maybe more businesses
will step up to the plate and do the same,' she says."

Amen!

February
25, 2011

Becky
Akers [send her mail] writes
primarily about the American Revolution.

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