King of the Imbeciles

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Here's True
Tale #4,876,923 in our continuing series, "The Slimy Slugs
of the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) Are Just Too
Stupid to Breathe": a "Master
Transportation Security Officer
/Behavior Detection Officer"
convinced a woman to leave Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson International
Airport with him, and then he sexually assaulted her.

Yep, I kid
you not. Our Rulers give this genius a pass, indeed, pay
him to molest us at airports, yet he departed that ally-ally-oxen-free
zone before committing his crime. Which magically restores the immorality
to the practice of his vocational skills, at least in Leviathan's
eyes.

Randall
Scott King, 49, "accompanied" the lady
"from
the airport," which "she left with him voluntarily,"
to "the Lakewood station," four
stops away
on Atlanta's subway. TSA has confessed its fond hopes
of fondling us on "mass
transit or … trains or maritime
," so perhaps our moron
mistakenly believed he was still at "work." At any rate,
he "allegedly restrained the woman in the MARTA parking lot…"
with "leopard print, novelty handcuffs."

Yo, Randy:
why didn't you just "detain" her at the airport? It's
totally legal, albeit a tad unconstitutional; you could keep her
in one of those
glass cages
, get her good and riled while you eyeball her charms
until you're ready to assault her; plus, you'd save the expense
of those "novelty handcuffs."

By the way
— leopard? Wouldn't rat-print, or, even better, cockroach-print,
be more appropriate?

But I digress.
Randy then drove the woman to his home, where "he
allegedly raped her
." And then had the decency to try to
commit suicide (alas, he failed. But then, failure's par for the
course with these bozos).

Though there's
no telling how many attacks Randy launched inside the airport, the
one he committed outside it has him in hot water — boiling, in fact,
the sort his other victims can only dream of: numerous cops from
various forces, including "MARTA
police," are "investigating"
the case. Indeed,
those from his hometown have "obtained" "criminal
warrants…" Whoa! There's a miracle: when was the last
time the words "warrant" and "TSA" appeared
in the same story from the corporate press?

Meanwhile,
you won't be surprised to learn that Randy "has
also spent time
in jail for stalking and harassment … King was
charged with nine offenses of harassment and stalking by communication
in January 2001.” Which has commentators in high dudgeon. “This
type of misdemeanor, this is harassment,” splutters Brent Brown,
"a security expert in Smyrna, Georgia." “… I would say
that would disqualify him for employment.”

Au contraire.
TSA doubtless considers it extremely relevant experience.

Still, we'll
excuse Brent. After all, he's a "security expert" rather
than a security-theater expert; no wonder he doesn't know
diddly about the TSA.

December
6, 2010

Becky
Akers [send her mail] writes
primarily about the American Revolution.

The
Best of Becky Akers

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