Thank Goodness I Live in a Free Country

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I was talking
with some friends over the Christmas holiday break and they were
commenting on how lucky we are that we live in a free country where
we have the liberty and the opportunity to live our lives the way
we want and are not controlled by the government like in other countries.

So I started
thinking about a particular day of mine a couple months ago:

I woke up in
the morning in my FHA (Federal Housing Administration) approved
home that was built in accordance with USDOE (Department of Energy),
FERC (Federal Energy Regulatory Commission), and numerous CFRs (Code
of Federal Regulations).

I went to the
bathroom to clean up for work. I showered with soap, shampoo and
other toiletry products that have been approved for me by the FDA
(Food and Drug Administration) using water that meets federal EPA
(Environmental Protection Agency) quality standards.

I took my morning
vitamins which had to be approved by the FDA.

I went downstairs
to eat breakfast foods that had to be approved by the FDA and listened
to my morning radio programs which are regulated by the FCC (Federal
Communication Commission).

I then got
into my EPA and DOT (Dept. of Transportation) standards approved
and FTC (Federal Trade Commission) regulated car and was forced
by the NHTSA (National Highway Traffic Safety Administration) to
buckle my seatbelt and put my daughter into an approved child seat.
I then drove on DOT regulated roads and was forced to drive a certain
speed while listening to more FCC approved programming on my radio.

I stopped for
gas but there wasn't any due to state legislated gas quality restrictions
which caused a decrease in the supply of gas and also gasoline price
controls that kept the price so artificially low that there was
an excess demand such that it sold out as soon as it arrived.

I arrived at
my DOL (Dept. of Labor) regulated and EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity
Commission) sanctioned place of employment, running on fumes, and
was forced to work the first 2 hours of my 8 hour shift for the
federal and state governments by giving almost 30% of my wages to
the IRS and SSA (Social Security Administration) with no compensation.

At lunchtime
I went with colleagues to eat and was forced to pay with the only
medium of exchange the government approves that is regulated by
the FRB (Federal Reserve Board): worthless fiat bank notes.

I then went
to pick up my daughter from school where she's learning a DOE (Dept.
of Education) approved curriculum. I took her to an HMO (Health
Maintenance Organization) approved doctor to get her HHS (Health
and Human Services) mandated vaccinations that I learned she needed
while watching a Disney family movie which was interrupted by an
HHS PSA.

After returning
to work I checked my SEC (Securities and Exchange Commission) and
IRS regulated investments in my now Federal Treasury owned banks
to see if I'll be able to retire someday since the SSA trust fund
that I've been paying into for 25 years has been raided by the federal
government and is now bankrupt.

That afternoon
I had to catch a flight to our office in Detroit aboard an FAA (Federal
Aviation Administration) approved plane operating at an FAA regulated
airport.

Before
boarding I had to pass through a TSA (Transportation Safety Administration)
security checkpoint where I was forced to disrobe down to my shirt,
pants and socks and pass through a scanning machine that saw right
through my remaining clothing.

Onboard I noticed
federal sky marshals with weapons so I decided to have a cocktail
composed of liquor that is controlled by the ATF (Alcohol Tobacco
and Firearms), as are the sky marshal's guns.

Once sufficiently
sedated with bourbon, I sat back and relaxed and thought to myself:
Thank God I don't live in a country where the government controls
your life!

December
27, 2008

Don Cooper
[send him mail] is an economist
living and working in Atlanta, Georgia.

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