Washington area residents should take caution. It will soon be January and Congress will be back in town. It is a good idea to lock up your daughters and your portable valuables. Come to think of it, this is the Amerkun Congress. Better keep an eye on your livestock and little boys, too.
Our youthful Emperor Georgie II will have to do without some of his wisest counselors for the time being. Lady Hillary and Sheik Obama are traveling on important government business. However, trusted advisors Lady Condolease and the Prime Minister, Richard, Lord Blackwater, are, as always, at the Emperor’s side. And Prince Teddy in the Senate will lead for the administration on increased immigration, universal health care, the problem of nuckler weapons, and other vital issues of Global Democratic Capitalism.
In the interest of balanced reporting, we note that one of our earlier reports has been officially denied. According to a source close to the matter, it is not true that Lady Hillary is often privately referred to by her retainers as "Lady Macbeth."
You may be sure that our noble congresspersons will soon be devoting their individual and collective wisdom and experince to the guidance of the nation in these troubled times: the next suitcase full of unmarked bills, sweet contracts for the brother-in-law, getting on the fact-finding cruise to Aruba or Bangkok, the next opportunity to hit on a society slut or a page boy, and if possible a photo-op with some Legionaires returned from the Mesopotamian front. Not any of the disabled or disfigred ones though.