Ward and June Cleaver The True Story of Despotism and Discontent

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A recent story, widely circulated on both the internet and mainstream news, reported that a private Jewish reform school in New York, Rodeph Sholom Day School, had announced its intentions of renouncing the upcoming Mother’s Day and Father’s Day holidays. In other words, celebrations of these traditional holidays were being banned so school officials could "protect the feelings of children raised by same-sex parents."

Indeed, it is shameless that we continue to promote the appalling values of the two-parent, heterosexual household. The children of two-mommy, two-daddy, or even one-mommy-no-daddy families must not be given the impression that they are not living in a "normal" family unit. We must understand that not all children are products of a Leave it to Beaver family.

After all, the Cleaver family, in all its straight-laced purity, could not accurately describe the typical American family, even in the times in which the TV show was produced. The Cleavers certainly don’t illustrate the family I grew up in. I do not ever remember Ward Cleaver yelling at the kids (he always spoke calmly), while I ALWAYS got yelled at. Plus, I never thought that anyone could have two sons and keep the kitchen appliances and the carpeting THAT clean. Now I realize it was all pure deception, probably on the part of some 1950’s right-wing conspiracy.

In fact, this popular television series, a staple for 50’s and 60’s nuclear families, was the most misleading and shallow presentation of family life ever produced for the airwaves. Not only did its presentation of a conservative, patriarchal lifestyle do injustice to progressive social behaviors, but it also served as a radical fabrication of family life that was to have adverse effects on generations of children to follow.

To begin, one must look at the intentions of the writers who manufactured such a ludicrous account of family life. In terms of social responsibility, the show’s writers took it as fact that this responsibility starts in the home, under the tutelage of attentive parents, making Mom and Dad accountable for their children. From this thesis, one can gather that there was an underlying "conservative" message in terms of child-rearing and promoting individual responsibilities. How evil. This should be deemed outrageous!

Two devices lacking on the show were the emphasis on the true duty of public schooling and its influence in child-raising, and the need for the entire village to step in and help raise its children, as well. After all, without positive indoctrination on the part of the public schools, how could society sway its children to adopt the tolerance and diversity standards demanded by the community or village? Clearly, this is a perilous oversight that must be further examined.

Actually, many Leave it to Beaver episodes saw fit to explain the school system as only support for educational preparation and not a pure system of ingraining, i.e., a raising by the village. However, we know we must force individuals to put their children into the hands of the State Indoctrinators and their paid psychobabblers so that they can mold our children according to the standards of the village. After all, who are these "conservative-types" to think that they know best how to raise their own children? As Hillary said, "it takes a village…." Well, it’s time we turn the kids over to the village. It’s time we allow a variety of alternative lifestyles to be taught and adequately sanctioned by the State at taxpayer expense.

Essentially, the importance of the village in child-rearing was seriously downplayed in this depressing TV series. Any astute observer will notice that Ward Cleaver, the oppressive family patriarch, clearly did not have the best intentions in raising and caring for his pseudo-family. After all, he had too much time for his kids, and he was too involved in their day-to-day problems, and he was always armed with immediate solutions. Ward thought it was his and June’s responsibility to raise the children, and he completely ignored the contributions the village could make to disciplining those brats. Plus, he loved his wife and was ceaselessly faithful (this is particularly disturbing). A good man would have had bisexual relationships on the side, a drinking problem, a nose-ring and tattoos, and illegitimate children elsewhere. Let’s face it: Ward Cleaver was a despot.

Looking back, had the village properly influenced the Cleaver family, we might not have been subjected to this goody-two-shoes influence upon a generation that had to witness this rubbish between the years 1957-1963. Thanks to Leave it to Beaver, we now are stuck with a generation of violent and demented individuals.

And June, of course, acted too fulfilled in her role as mother, bearing Ward’s children (gasp!) and keeping his home (bigger gasp!). No woman could possibly be "fulfilled" in this situation. After all, she made three hot meals a day and had dinner ready when her husband got home. And this was all seen as tender loving care and devotion toward a "traditional" family? How can we allow young children to be exposed to such brainwashing? Besides, she spent way too much time in the kitchen, and attending church and school meetings. None of this was clearly a good influence on the Cleaver kids. Jerry Springer-like parenting was clearly missing in their lives.

Remember, June met Ward as a teenager, and never had the chance to promote her own sexual freedoms and feminist attributes. She was surely a discontented woman masquerading as a homebody extraordinaire who coveted a Betty Friedan-like influence in her life. This made her a very unstable woman. Certainly, the children could have been better raised by Rosie O’Donnell or Ellen DeGenerate, umm, DeGeneres, with a Robert Mapplethorpe inspired upbringing.

Plus, this display of oppression on national TV must have compelled thousands of young female viewers to grow up emulating June and her cloistered ways. Imagine this current generation of would-be feminists being corrupted by such systematic nonsense? Imagine all of the could-be nuclear physicists that have been reduced to operating a Maytag stove or packing the children’s Blues Clue’s lunchboxes? June Cleaver destroyed an entire generation of female accomplishment.

Thanks to a website called LeaveItToBeaver.org, one is able to ascertain that in one particular episode, Wally lectures to his little brother Beaver, "In a couple of years, you’ll go to high school, and then you’ll go to college and meet a whole bunch of girls. You’ll probably marry one. Then you’ll have a whole bunch of kids and a job and everything."

In the typical 1950’s fashion, this attitude implies that there is only one lifestyle available to a young man clearly able to make his own decisions as to family choice. Apparently, Wally was not discerning enough to maintain that a "traditional", heterosexual lifestyle was not Beaver’s only choice. This shows a degree of intolerance that the diverse society of today would not allow. In the most perverse sense, the Beav was constantly hammered at to be traditional, marry a woman, and have babies like good u2018ole Ward and June. Imagine the warped mindsets produced by such babble.

All said, the Cleaver family was clearly dysfunctional. Understand that June was oppressed by the patriarchal views of the times, and these views were then passed down to Wally and the Beav so they could further oppress the women of their generation. I’m sure if Mrs. Cleaver had been allowed choice as opposed to the societal coercion she endured, she would have chosen a much more satisfying career. She certainly would have been able to obtain her PhD in mathematics or intellectual history, or have found success as a corporate CEO had a male-dominated and autocratic civilization not held her down.

June also would have chosen a much more stable environment in which to raise kids: possibly a one-parent home supported on welfare, or a "Heather has Two Mommies" situation, or even making use of David Crosby’s sperm (as Miss Melissa Etheridge did) to produce the ideal family. And Wally and the Beav could have been better served in some State-subsidized daycare center while mom was away spearheading giant mergers.

Poor June.

And to think that modern TV could have portrayed a prozac-laden June Cleaver as a domestically oppressed, intellectually repressed, and sexually misappropriated housewife having an affair with the school principal and feeding Ritalin to Beaver the first time he threw a spitwad in class.

This would have been a much better influence on "the children."

Karen De Coster [send her mail] is a politically incorrect CPA, and an MA student in economics at Walsh College in Michigan.

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