I'll Wait for Sales Day On This Peace Accord Deal

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$100 Billion for peace between Israel and Palestine strikes me as just a tad high for an "historic peace accord." I mean, didn’t I just pay for the Oslo agreement, and all the rest of these "historic peace accords"?

"According to a variety of observers, it is conceivable that a final peace agreement could cost as much as $100 billion to implement" (UPI, seen at newsmax.com yesterday).

Would it be asking too much for these boyos to at least have a little war first? You know, nothing too big or too ugly. Something that could play on CNN for a few weeks and we could then at least see a reason for a $100 billion "peace accord."

As it is, I’d have to fork over a whole bunch of money for the same sort of "peace" that I’ve been seeing for what feels like my entire lifetime in the Mideast. And frankly, I’d rather not. The price is just too high. I’ll wait for the sale, thanks.

The principal shysters of this deal are all too smug for me. Here’s another one of those no-name spokespeople (may their tribe decrease!), this one from Israel: "While funding will ultimately be critical to implementing a deal, it seems reasonable to assume that the nations of the world will find a way to provide funding for an historic peace accord."

One might ask, reasonable to whom? To the tribe of no-name spokespeople, apparently, but it ain’t reasonable to me!

Well, hell. How many "historic peace accords" do I have to pay for? And will some accountant out there do the figuring and let me know if a plain, simple war just might be cheaper than this peace deal? My bet is it could be. After all, my country wouldn’t be involved, and lord knows, we’ve given both Israel and Palestine enough money to have themselves a nice little war to solve their interminable, neverending disagreements.

And why is it that I see that both sides of this longest-running ever situation comedy known as a Israel/Palestinian peace process seem to have Bill Clinton’s "legacy" shorthairs in their greedy little mits? Tug them hairs, boys. This fella’s so desperate for a legacy that there is no telling what he might do. Then again, he left the brilliant Madeline Albright, that wonderwoman of calming down the Balkans fame, in charge. Someone is going to have to take the fall for this one, and it might as well be Mad.

Well, I’m going to take an even approach on this one and wait for the Sale on the Peace Accord.

Better work on bringing down that price, Ms. Albright. Bill Clinton’s "legacy" already stinks to high heaven, and it will be tough selling a load of rotting fish, even to Americans.

Patricia Neill is managing editor of a scholarly journal on the life and work of William Blake, the 18th-century artist and poet.

© 2000 by Patricia Neill

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